Depending on your point of view, birth is either the greatest escape or humanity’s biggest eviction. And, that, doesn’t even begin to explain the huge diversity of opinion about how it should happen or the myriad of events that can unfold during the process all of us have experienced. After almost two years of writing Babylune, I can now present a highly-selective, highly subjective A to Z compendium of labor, or what my people call labour, and birth.
A is for Age and the panic it induces.
B is for Birth Plan. Prepare one, but prepare to be flexible.
C is for Codeine. Just don’t take it after the birth.
D is for Dirty, as in quick and dirty advice.
E is for Essentials, the things you should pack.
F is for Fertility and keeping it safe.
G is for Gum that you might just need.
H is for Home Birth, one direction to go in.
J is for Jerome. Patron Saint of expectant mothers.
K is for Kegel, you’ll do them for life. (I just did three)
L is for Libido both lost and found.
M is for Mineral Oil, to help mother’s escape from pregnancy by evicting babies.
N is for New. New mother, new born, new life, new role.
O is for Obstetrician and choosing the right one.
P is for Postpartum and all its complaints.
Q is for Quince, because I was desperate for a Q. Even the Queen has given birth, I’ve never written about her.
R is for Reproduction and all the Responsibilities is comes with.
S is for Sensual, which birth can be.
T is for Teen Mothers, to let them know that they will do just fine.
U is for Unassisted Childbirth, a process I don’t recommend.
V is for VBAC, a great acronym.
W is for Woman because on this issue, we do all the work.
X is for X-Rays, the dental kind.
Y is for Yams, nature’s progesterone.
Z is for zzzzzzzzzs, as in getting none.
And you know, I could go through the alphabet again and not duplicate a single letter…except for Q and Z…