Dating is confusing, so we make up rules to follow. Amid the chaos of trying to interpret texts, voicemails, and morning-after behavior, there are feelings to be hurt, so we like to give ourselves some safety rails. Problem is, even though dating rules are meant to help us succeed, we don’t always think they’re true, or that they apply to everyone. Whether you’re a Sandy Olsson-type or a true Betty Rizzo, we think it’s time to grow up and break these dating-rule dinosaurs:
1. Men Should Always Pay. We call bullshit. If someone – anyone – invites us to a specific restaurant or event, sure, we’d like them to pay. Same goes if we do the inviting. There’s nothing wrong with someone paying for your meal, but we believe a healthy relationship can spring out of splitting the bill, too.
2. Just kiss on a first date. This rule is built on all kinds of assumptions that men are always the ones trying to “get lucky” on a date, and if Sex and the City taught us anything, it’s that this is a big fat lie. If you’re dating to get laid, then go right ahead – and carry condoms. If you’re dating to get to know someone and build a meaningful relationship beyond sex, own that.
3. Always make him ask you out first. We’re not big fans of being passive, so this isn’t our favorite dating tenet. We believe in taking initiative, and this applies to dating, too.
4. Never be available when he wants you to be. If you actually have a life (which we know you do), you don’t need to sit around pretending you’re busy: You are! Don’t drop all plans for a guy – if you have a date with the treadmill, keep it – but don’t play games, either.
5. Always laugh at his jokes. A stony glare never helped a date go smoothly, but we don’t think you should fake a laugh any more than you should fake an orgasm. Funny guys win big points (and laughs), but we shouldn’t have to win our points by acting more entertained than we actually are.
Do you have dating rules you live by? Tell us whether you believe in dating rules in the comments section, below:
(photo: courtesy of New Line Cinema)