We’ve been reading fitness magazines for years, but lately we’ve been wondering why we keep shelling out for the stacks of glossy, virgin paper gathering dust in our apartments. How much new news are we really getting? A lot of the messages we get from fitness magazines are not only the same things we’ve been hearing for years. It can be motivating to get the reminders, but then again, they’re usually contradictory and confusing. Save your money (and a few trees), and print out our list of the top 15 fitness magazine lessons:
1) Which body stereotype fits you best? Pear-shaped, apple-shaped, stick-thin, or hopelessly fat? Knowing this will help you determine which workout is best for you. But don’t get your hopes up; there’s no changing what mother nature did to those hips.
2) Plan your workouts according to seasons: Working out inside, working out outside, pretending you work out, and working out to look great in ____.
3) Learn your lingo when it comes to the gym. Several key words can have tricky double meanings when it comes to your workouts: Peak — When you feel the best (you’re in “peak” condition) or worst (you’re at the “peak” of your workout – you know, that moment when you think the treadmill might eat you alive). Plateau — The time when you’re workout out really consistently but not getting results, or the time when you’re taking a break from that glute-torching hill workout on the elliptical.
4) Women can never gain enough muscle mass to look like a man. But don’t lift too much weight, because you want to build long, lean muscles, not thick beefy muscles.
5) Eat a lot of protein to get the best results from all that hard work you’re putting in at the gym. But eat a lot of whole grains, fruits, and vegetables to fuel all that hard work you’re putting in at the gym.
6) Never shower at the gym. You’ll get athlete’s foot if you do.
7) Always shower at the gym. You’ll get acne and staph infections if you don’t.
8) Trade cardio for a weights. You’ll burn more calories and torch fat faster.
9) Supplement that new weight routine with some cardio. You could still use the fast calorie burn of a tough treadmill workout.
10) Everyone has different calorie needs. Take the following quiz and we’ll tell you how many calories you should get in a day, based on weight, height, and activity level.
11) You should eat about 1200 calories a day.
12) Avoid things like lattes, cocktails, wine, and sugary smoothies. They’ll make you fat and give you wrinkles.
13) Indulge in things like lattes, cocktails, wine, and sugary smoothies every once in awhile. They’re full of anti-oxidants, plus, giving yourself a treat here and there has great stress-relief and anti-aging benefits.
14) You know what’s really hot in workout wear right now? Neon!
15) Love your body. We encourage you to feel comfortable looking like any of the women featured in our Love Yourself Naked feature. Until you turn the page and see the women featured in our fashion editorials.