We have a morbid curiosity about celebrity New Year’s Resolutions: Whether they’re totally out of touch with reality or just completely self-indulgent, they’re usually entertaining enough to keep us flipping through magazines or scrolling through online interviews. Remember Gwyneth Paltrow’s 2010 resolution, sent to her fans via GOOP newsletter last year? We love the idea of learning how to meditate, but reading her announcement was like watching a train wreck — we wish we had the willpower to look away:
My New Year’s resolution is to learn how to meditate. It’s always sounded like something I should do, but I don’t know how to. My friends who do it say it’s really freakin’ brilliant. They say you can’t know the peace/awareness/contentment until you do it. My brain drives me mental. I am going to start. Tomorrow. I asked three amazing people to share how they achieve this bliss. Their approaches are different but I think they are pretty much landing in the same spot.
I think I get it.
— Gwyneth Paltrow
This year, we dug up some funny tweets and interviews from stars whose resolutions focus on health and well-being. Thank you, Paula Deen and Jillian Michaels, for brightening our first day back at work. Your resolutions make us laugh and realize that even if we’re ultimately uninspired by the idea of making promises for the sake of tradition, they can at least be entertaining: