Miami restaurant Kung Fu Kitchen & Sushi is now offering a special where you can eat sushi off a naked human, if that’s what happens to float your boat. But be prepared to pay up: it will cost you and 15 of your friends about $500 to enjoy sashimi and sushi rolls off the nude body of a nubile Miami beach model. “Naked sushi” was banned in China in 2005, but apparently the state of Florida is ok with Kung Fu Kitchen’s new special, just as long as the restaurant follows all health codes.
Kung Fu Kitchen & Sushi is taking lots of precautions to make sure no bare skin touches any food: the models (you can choose a male or a female) will have banana leaves on their sensitive areas, both for modesty and for highly necessary sanitary reasons. The models will also apparently talk, if you want them to? I’m picturing really awkward conversations consisting of “Um, that’s my nipple!” and “A little to the left.” The poor model in this news segment (of course, a woman) stays incredibly still as the chef squirts spicy wasabi on her breast; that can’t be comfortable.
The super classy and enterprising owner of the restaurant, Nathan Lieberman, says:
“It’s mostly for groups, parties, bachelor parties, bachelorette parties, birthday parties. You call in advance or pop in and hopefully we have someone that wants to take their clothes off and lie on a table.”
Did you hear that? Hopefully, they have someone! I’m hopeful that someone gets a large cut of the $500 price tag. I mean, are these human plates employees of the restaurant? Or do they get a call saying “We need a body,” rush over, and strip down? Either way, these people deserve generous, generous tips.
The naked sushi deal runs until September 30th and consists of a chef’s special, called omakase in Japanese.