It seems like just yesterday that Snooki was advertising diet pills in a Saved By The Bell-esque throwback. But now, if her Twitter account is any indication, America’s favorite overly-tanned reality star is all grown up. Last night, Snooki gave birth to her son, Lorenzo Dominic LaValle. Nice work, Snooki. I can’t wait to see what kind of a mom you’ll be. I could, however, wait a lifetime to see another mean Tweet or comment about your wait. Unfortunately, those have already started pouring in.
Here’s Snooki’s announcement Tweet. Awwww.
Aaaaand here’s what people are already saying.
Har har. Also, hardly surprising.
Snooki’s pregnancy has been ripe with tabloid-ready moments. Coupled with her over-the-top television personal, her criticism of lamaze classes, her pre-natal yoga, her up-and-down relationship with gaining weight, the pregnancy has been kind of a perfect storm of bad jokes, insensitive quips, and, maybe, just a touch of genuine concern for the girl who admitted that she eats unhealthy food and is overweight because it makes for better TV.
But I’m worried that it’s only going to get worse for Snooki. With a new baby in her arms, the Guidette has passed through the potentially-hurtful “pregnant celebrity” stage and into the probably-very-hurtful “post-baby body” stage. And for a girl who has very publicly struggled with eating disorders and poor body image, that stage can be a minefield. I’m already gritting my teeth, waiting for the cascade of body snarking that’s sure to follow because it always does because why can’t women just immediately shed any and all baby weight like Victoria Beckham, jeez?
But maybe not. Maybe she’ll be so mature and wonderful and nurturing that all of the people who are making fun of her on the internet will be forced to swallow the reality that people change and grow up and become actual people. That someone like Snooki can put on an act to make a ton of money and become notorious, and then actually do right by their real family members.
That’s what I’m hoping, anyway. Because this is America, and damnit, people can change and become great moms who feel good about themselves.
Which is why I’ll just say: Congrats, Snooki. I wish you and your family all the best.
Images: Dan Jackman./WENN.com, and Twitter