• Tue, Jun 25 2013

5 Things I Learned About Boobs Today

boobs-in-the-newsIs it just me or has the media especially been ripe with boob related stories as of late? It’s probably me because I have a google alert for “boobs” and another one for “breasts.” Why? Because it’s my job.

1) Women learn the power of boobs at a very young age. This video shows a little girl wishing for big boobs on her birthday. It’s cute, but also a bummer because stupid society is already getting to her. The Guyism blogger who posted the video wrote the following about his hypothetical future daughter in response:

I’m not a parent so I’m not sure what the perspective is here. But how would you feel if you were a dad and your daughter made this wish? Like I’d definitely root for my daughter to have a rack in order to help out with all of the inherent advantages that come with that. But not too big. Definitely don’t want Jessica Rabbit.

Way to start sexualizing and slut-shaming your imaginary daughter, bro.

2) Clueless actress and vegan celebrity, Alicia Silverstone is starting a vegan breast milk sharing program called Kind Mama Milk Share  “…Because we are a community of beautiful souls who recognize the importance of food as health, I say we help support those mamas and babies who need a hand during one of the most important times in their lives.” Do your thing, vegan moms!

3) Guys who prefer big boobs to small boobs tend to be bigger misogynists. In a recent study, 32.7% of participants rated medium boobs as “most attractive,” 24.4% were into large boobs,19.1% were into very large boobs, 15.5% dig small boobs and 8.3% totally get boners for very small boobs. The biggest boobs were the dudes that displayed objectifying, violent and sexist attitudes towards women.

4) A Beijing woman played video games until her boobs exploded. Well, her breast implant ruptured. She was lying on her stomach for so long that the pressure damaged her allegedly low-quality implants. Her game of choice is called Dragon Summon and I’m probably going to buy it right now because it sounds engrossing.

5) Kim Kardashian’s boobs are bigger and more famous than ever. She had a baby, so her boobs are bigger. Apparently, the sex tape haver turned reality TV sensation is now a G-cup who is “obsessed with breastfeeding.” Titillating stuff.

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