Condoms are great. They’re not perfect (not even close) but they work pretty well–if you use them correctly. Using a condom incorrectly puts you and your partner at risk of unwanted pregnancy, STIs and according to a myth I just made up, nightmares.
According to the NHS, condoms are 98% effective if you don’t fuck up using them, but there are oh so very many ways to fuck it up. Condoms are the only contraception that protects again both infection and pregnancy, which is pretty cool, but if you screw up using them, they aren’t protecting you or your sex-friend against anything. The whole point of protected sex is safety, so use ‘em or lose ‘em. Just kidding, don’t lose ‘em, just use ‘em properly.
Used improperly, condoms could slip off or tear and you might as well have just loosely draped the peen in a plastic bag. Essentially, If you use a condom wrong, you are wasting everybody’s time. By the way, I’m talking about male condoms because I don’t know anyone who has even seen a female condom in person.
Grab a banana and a rubber, I’m going to show you the best ways to make condoms ineffective: