NBC Atlanta affiliate recentlyÂ reportedÂ that a 3rd grader at Porterdale Elementary School was suspended for two days after getting busted for snorting smarties. You read that right: smarties, the hard stuff. The 9-year-old child was seen crushing up the tart candy and inhaling it like a Bret Easton Ellis character in a downward spiral. The school did what it had to do and taught that kid a lesson. Or the school reacted disproportionately.
Should the little boy have been reprimanded? Yes. Told he shouldn’t do what he did and why? Yes. Taken out of school for two days? Absolutely not. I wonder what else Porterdale Elementary treats as a suspend-able offense.
Here are a few ideas of other things children don’t understand but should be punished for anyway:
- Knowing the F-word
- Simulating sex by impersonating pop-stars
- Holding their privates parts with their hands when they have to pee
- Curiosity in general
- Reading books about witchcraft
Of course snorting candy should be discouraged, but punishing a little kid for something so innocuous is preposterous. The child wasn’t selling or using drugs. It’s not like he was the first kid to do this. When I was a child, I remember kids snorting pixie stick powder. I’m pretty sure that as long as we’ve had noses and powder, humans have been inhaling all sorts of things.Â Perhaps the school could better supervise its student body so that children don’t consume candy in a dangerous way, rather than disciplining a child for mimicking adult activity.