13 Methods To Get Jennifer Aniston’s Enviably Bangin’ Bod, Ranked By Ease

Jennifer Aniston arrives at the "Life Of Crime" PremiereHow far are you willing to go to have someone else’s body? If you envy a famous persons body so intensely that you’d do anything to have it for yourself, there are things you can do to get it, even if your body type and lifestyle are completely different from that celeb’s. 

Jennifer Aniston has been in the public eye for a long time, inspiring people with her haircuts and her undeniably awesome and healthy bod. She’s 45 years old today and people are still clamoring for her physique secrets (physecrets?). Her diet and exercise regiments have been revealed again and again to magazines to appease the people who hope to replicate her parts on their own forms, despite the fact that it’s straight up impossible to “get Jennifer Aniston’s legs” no matter how many squats and presses you do. Still, if you’re willing to put enough work in, maybe just maybe you can attain Jennifer Aniston’s specific figure.

Here are 13 methods to help you get Jennifer Aniston’s famously rockin’ body, ranked from least to most difficult:

  1. Photoshop your face onto pictures of Jennifer Aniston’s body. This one is so easy. You can do it on your cell phone while you’re on the toilet.
  2. Buy a novelty t-shirt (like one of these) made with her headless body on it creating an optical illusion.
  3. Ask your hairdresser to give you “The Rachel.” Hope your body follows suit.
  4. Use Aveeno products and drink lots of Smart Water.
  5. Pray for it. I’ve never tried it, but I heard prayer is a miracle worker.
  6. Make a deal with the Devil. Offer him the soul of an innocent.
  7. Plastic surgery. It will be expensive, tiring and hard on your body, but you won’t have to workout.
  8. Try to replicate her diet from We’re The Millers. Kale is your new indulgence.
  9. Make a polyjuice potion like Harry Potter did when he wanted to look like Jennifer Aniston
  10. Do what Jennifer Aniston does to maintain Jennifer Aniston’s body: “run and work out every day.” If you want legs like Jennifer Aniston, you need to do two-hour yoga sessions, twenty minutes on the treadmill, aqua-jogging and Budoken. All you need is the time, money and incentive to workout like a celebrity whose job requires she have a very specific body.
  11. Believe in reincarnation, die and come back as Jennifer Aniston.
  12. Kidnap Jennifer Aniston and Buffalo Bill her. Wear her skin like a suit if you’re so obsessed with her bod. This one will be hard as it requires you commit many felonious acts.
  13. Be Jennifer Aniston. You’ll never have Jennifer Aniston’s body as long as someone else has it. Right now,Jennifer Aniston has her body and you have yours; so it will be all but impossible.

If anyone tries to get Jennifer Aniston’s body and manages do it, let us know what worked for you.

Image via Getty

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    • Muggle

      BAHAHAHAH #9. That’s a fanfic in the making.

      • Joanna Rafael

        I heard JK Rowling regrets not having Harry end up AS Jennifer Aniston.

      • Muggle

        Ginny/Jennifer Aniston? hawt.

      • Joanna Rafael

        But what house would Jennifer Aniston be in at Hogwarts?

      • Muggle

        She’s American, so she’d probably actually attend the Salem Witches’ Institute.

    • Yusuf Wibisono

      Siap menang dan berhasil itu hal yang biasa tetapi siap kalah dan gagal itu yang luar biasa

    • GretaSchlachter
    • Elise

      Hysterical! But in all seriousness – I am truly sick of Jennifer Aniston, her fabulous hair, her banging body, etc. Enough… I wouldn’t be surprised if she feels the same way, although I don’t know if she’s self-aware enough to pull a Hathaway. Then again I don’t think the media gives her a choice.

      And since this IS Mommyish – while I’d love Jen’s money, I wouldn’t trade my slightly softened 40-something body for hers/her life. I’ll take my loose abs and eye-rolling tween any day.

      • Elise

        Whoops, caught this on a link in Mommyish; my bad