Winter Is Cumming: Sex Moves Inspired By Game Of Thrones

 

game of thrones sexThis post goes out to all the sexually active nerds out there.

After a few long seasons without Game of Thrones, I couldn’t be more excited for HBO’s sexually explicit adaptation to finally return this Sunday. One of the main reasons that the program appeals to audiences beyond classic fantasy nerds because it’s so porny and raunchy. Here’s to hoping the season premiere is one of the most sexy episodes yet.

In honor of the beginning of the show’s fourth season, let’s go over some sex moves inspired by Game of Thrones:

  1. Direwolf Style- This is what they call doggie style in the North. 
  2. Mother of Dragons aka Reverse Khaleesi- Turn the heat up like you can’t get burned, get on top and show your Sun and stars who’s the boss. 
  3. White Walker- Everyone involved is upright, standing up, and slowly walking across the room while having sex. 
  4. The God of Tits and Wine- All you have to do is channel Tyrion Lannister. Confident and witty dirty talk is key, as well as never having sex with the underage. 
  5. Dong Of Ice And Fire- Use your mouth to put a Trojan Fire and Ice lubricated condom on their dick while humming the Game of Thrones theme song. 
  6. Faceless Assassin- This move is anal sex while wearing a few masks layered on top of each other. Every few minutes, remove a mask so it seems like you can change your face the way other people change their clothes. 
  7. Red Wedding- Start intercourse off with something nice like missionary and then get violent very suddenly. 
  8. The Virgin Bastard- Find someone who knows nothing and blow their mind in a cave. 
  9. The Grey and Joyless- Torture your partner ruthlessly. Fuck them until they don’t know their name. 
  10. The Old Gods- Use the power of prayer and magic to seduce and manipulate your way to the top! 

Images via Giphy

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    • Samantha Escobar

      REVERSE KHALEESI.

    • PamilaWWilliams

      This move is anal sex while wearing a few masks layered on top of each other. Every few minutes, remove a mask so it seems like you can change your face the way other people change their clothes. http://qr.net/rGQc