• Tue, Jul 1 - 9:17 am ET

The #DrHobbyLobby Hashtag Captures The 13 Best Tweets About SCOTUS’ Latest Ruling

Yesterday, the Supreme Court ruled that women’s rights don’t matter…at least, that’s how I perceived it when the court voted a 5-4 in Burwell v. Hobby Lobby and Conestoga Wood v. Burwell, declaring the Affordable Care Act violates the religious freedom of certain employers.

In simpler terms? For-profit employers with religious objections, or corporations controlled by religious families can refuse to pay for contraceptive coverage under Obamacare.

This means that regardless of what religion a woman is, five men have determined her future access to personal reproductive health. And the company in question, Hobby Lobby, is a chain of arts and crafts stores…not exactly a company you’d think would be calling the shorts on birth control.

This decision is bananas, bullsh*t, bonkers…or as the dissent said, “a decision of startling breadth.”

So startling, in fact, that #DrHobbyLobby began trending on Twitter.

And we found the best, funniest and darkest Tweets discussing—or just point blank making fun—of the matter.

This basically sums it up (despite the fact there’s no #DrHobbyLobby hashtag).  Five men with penises–who have never had to shamefully buy the morning after pill, or worry about “being late”—are calling the shots on this matter. Barf.

Sad, but true.  


If you don’t have a seasonal wreath, we think a stale bagel or one of those plastic Poland Spring water bottle tops could suffice (it’s the same shape, right?). One more question: When it gets lodged up there (you know where), will the company pay to get it out, or will we have to go to directly to the ER? Trying to plan ahead, here.

This birth control option is how MTV’s Teen Mom got started.

Ugh, this makes me cringe. But more importantly, can it be done? I’m asking for a friend.  

 

If companies don’t have to pay for birth control because of their religion, the answer to all our problems must be in the bible…right? Well, according to @Clarknt67 and @goodasyou, not so much. Hey, Jesus…could you help us out a little, here?

Ha! More Jesus humor. So. On. Point.

 

If you can’t beat ‘em (or knock sense into ‘em), make fun of ‘em on Twitter.

Only if your child is a straight little girl. Otherwise, Hobby Lobby will have a whole different problem.

But seriously….we need to know.


And finally, @ourbluerainbow poses a very legit question: WTF should we do now?!

Share This Post:
  • http://misuser.blogspot.com Alex Lee

    “How to Rainbow-Loom a Chastity Belt” #JesusBeCrafty

  • Fallopian Twerker Phillips

    I’m sure the makers of this video had no idea that they could be touting a new form of birth control: #sparklebabies https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VR4O68kUj5c

  • Lily Savage

    I’m surprised no one has lobbied harder for the DIY “glitter puffy paint sweatshirt.” It sounds like a great source of birth control to me.

  • wispy

    I died at the small, seasonal wreath. Hilarious!

  • Abortionismurder

    Hobby Lobby DOES pay for birth control. 16 different kinds to be exact. What they don’t pay for is murdering the baby after conception. Get your facts straight.

    • Khope47

      Hey guess what….the morning after pill and IUDs ARENT murder! They aren’t even abortificants! If you are pregnant, these methods do not cause an abortion. They only stop you from getting pregnant. Also….Hobby Lobby doesn’t pay anyone’s medical bills. Insurance premiums are paid by….the EMPLOYEES that hold the policiy!

    • Krystal Allen

      You could be pregnant and eat an entire bowl full of the morning after pill and nothing would happen.

    • http://SommelierinSneakers.blogspot.com/ SomminSneakers

      This is the best fucking line about this whole thing, ever.

    • Krystal Allen

      Hey Hobby Lobby? Any plans to sell your stock in TEVA and DANCO? You know, the companies that make Plan B and the morning after pills?

      I guess if you can *make* money on abortions, that’s fine with you.

    • PoppyTart

      Conception does not = baby, just thought you should know.

    • PoppyTart

      Reducing access to birth control actually = more abortions…