8 Things I’d Rather Do Than Get Weighed Today
March 26, 2008 by angelique
Filed under Women's Health
8. Eat an octopus. Alive. Feisty. Angry. (The octopus, I mean.)
7. Watch a 24-hour marathon of “The Lawrence Welk Show”’s most polyester, white bread moments.
6. Enter a hip-hop dancing contest. (I cannot, repeat CANNOT, dance worth a p’tooty.)
5. Give eighteen smelly apes gynecological exams… without sedation for any of us.
4. Spend a day with any of the political candidates. (Sorry, folks. This presidential election is a “write in” just for spite and out of disgust.)
3. Work in a box factory for 72-hours straight just making sure that the corregated cardboard fits nicely.
2. Chew on tin foil in a lightning storm while sitting under an umbrella that’s located beneath a large oak tree.
1. Read “Walden Two” again without grimacing or throwing the book across the room in frustration and horror.
