I offer my apologies for anything I’ve said that has slighted you.

My comment on the “former” [alcoholic stuff] was simply a response to you saying “which you cannot be doing by your last statement” (which was borne of my ‘former alcoholic’ reference). I truly believe that alcoholism, at least for some, is a simple physical addiction with no deeper psychological roots.

We’ve all got our own row to hoe and yours and mine seem to be somewhat different right now – perhaps that will change.

This is your blog and I’m not here (very seriously) to make waves. I appreciate that you’ve published and responded to my submissions. Perhaps someone will recognize themselves in them…

I wish you the very best of luck in your endeavor to abstain. I hope the same for myself.

Just stop trying to bring me down your road. Been there, done that, didn’t work for me, not wasting any more time there.

I’m recovering because it works for me. I’m not helpless or despairing. If you have a problem with that – guess who’s problem it will remain?

Love the character assassination (doubt you’ll see it that way). Brainwashing as evidenced by my writings. LMAO. To be cliche – my brain damn well needed washing (and, it was just like yours is).

BTW – why are you soooo hung up on this “former” alcoholic stuff? No one has mentioned it here – except you!

The term ‘recovering alcoholic’ is used to reinforce that idea of helplessness and despair I mentioned above.

I have precious little interest in the culture of helplessness promulgated by AA and the twelve steps. I am not helpless and my life is not unmanageable.

I have a physical addiction not unlike addiction to nicotine or other drugs. The reward center in my brain is screwed up after years of drinking and doesn’t function normally in the absence of alcohol.

I don’t want to talk about it. I don’t want to hear other drunks talk about how screwed up their lives are or were. I want to break a physical addiction. After that since I know that I am prone to this addiction, I will not be able to safely drink. Just like cigarettes – I know if I smoke one, I’ll be smoking a pack a day within a week.

I believe the right treatment for me will end up being aversion therapy (by far the most effective treatment) at a place like Schick-Shadel and either naltrexone or Campral to jumpstart the rewiring of the dopamine machinery in my brain. I am making arrangements to begin all of this before the end of the year.

I don’t think AA is a bad thing and it certainly works for some people. But I do believe it engages in a bit of brainwashing, as evidenced by some of your writings.

Control… therein lies the fallacy of your well and long thought out reasoning. It doesn’t work and it won’t work on me or anyone else who is truly practicing a program of recovery which you cannot be doing by your last statement.

It is impossible to get sober when you’re drinking. You are using an alcoholic mind in your thoughts. An alcoholic mind cannot distinguish the truth from the false. I know – I’ve been there.

I’d offer you the same thinking – about “Functional” being a misnomer – quote “Why not just accept that the term means what it means and leave it at that?”

But you want to disagree. Any “good” alcoholic would want to disagree to maintain “permission” to continue to drink. As you do…

Sorry, but your reasoning isn’t valid. Please – go to a meeting and work the Twelve Steps. Then you’ll understand.

Not everyone who is addicted to booze has “their problems pile up on them and become astonishingly difficult to solve”. I know this is true because I am a functional alcoholic. I’m addicted to alcohol and crave it immensely. I just make sure that I feed my craving at times and places where it won’t disrupt anything else. I think Kim (above) was saying the same thing about herself. That doesn’t mean she & I aren’t alcoholics. It just means that we have enough control of it to choose the time and place to start drinking. After that first drink, I basically lose the ability to say ‘no’ to more.

Does the alcohol have any effect on other areas of my life? You betcha. It can’t be good for my health, the time I spend drinking/intoxicated could be put to better use, etc…

It seems to me that you (and Dr. Neill) are changing the commonly-understood meaning of “Functional Alcoholic” so that you can insist that such people don’t exist. Why not just accept that the term means what it means and leave it at that?

And no, there is no portion of the definition of ‘alcoholic’ the demands dysfunction (again, other than the alcohol addiction itself). The term simply refers to “continued excessive OR compulsive alcohol consumption”.

I want and need to quit drinking. And when I do, I’ll be a former alcoholic.

Hi. Thanks for stopping by…

I am not a qualified professional. That being said I can offer my opinion subject to it being wrong. I think you’re right about the younger mans resentment. His father doesn’t sound like an alcoholic. He may simply be a heavy drinker.

Heavy drinkers can be functional, imho. I don’t personally believe that an alcoholic can be functional because by the definition I understand an alcoholic is disfunctional.

I think you’d be better off finding a professional who understands both drug addiction and alcoholism – a psychiatrist with a medical degree.

If you cannot do that my next thought would be for you to attend Al-Anon so that you can find the way to peace of mind in the middle of the obvious chaos.

Good luck,
Mark

If I offered my personal opinion, I’d say that your Mom isn’t a real alcoholic, therefore the topic matter doesn’t really apply.

I do appreciate a differing view btw…