A Matter Of Choice?
July 24, 2006 by Mark
Filed under Diseases & Conditions
Is it a matter of choice whether or not you and I take a drink/use drugs/overeat etc. today? I’m speaking of those of us who openly/honestly admit to having these diseases.
It is completely understandable that those who do not have these diseases would have the idea that it is a matter of will power or choice. How could it be that we don’t have the ability to walk away from a drink, a joint, a line, a snack etc.?
Some of the members (and a few friends) of The Primary Purpose Group have nicely organized related points from the Big Book “Alcoholics Anonymous” in “That Ain’t In The Book.” These are examples of things we say to each other that actually have little basis in fact and are more likely an attempt at profundity. (We are such profound people lol).
What we say = bold, what it says in the Book (reality) = normal
“Remember your last drunk”
“I choose not to drink today”
Page 24 Paragraph 2: “The fact is that most alcoholics, for reasons yet obscure, have lost the power of choice in drink.”
“Don’t drink and go to meetings.”
“Don’t drink, even if your ass falls off.”
“Don’t drink, no matter what.”
Page 34, paragraph 2: “Many of us felt we had plenty of character. There was a tremendous urge to cease forever. Yet we found it impossible. This is the baffling feature of alcoholism as we know it—this utter inability to leave it alone, no matter how great the necessity or the wish.”
Page 34, paragraph 3: “Whether such a person can quit upon a nonspiritual basis depends upon the extent to which he has already lost the power to choose whether he will drink or not.”
“I have a choice to not drink today.”
Page 30, paragraph 3: “We alcoholics are men and women who have lost the ability to control our drinking. We know that no real alcoholic ever recovers control. All of us felt at times that we were regaining control, but such intervals – usually brief – were inevitably followed by still less control, which led in time to pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization. We are convinced to a man that alcoholics of our type are in the grip of a progressive illness. Over any considerable period we get worse, never better.”
And my personal “favorite,”
“Meeting makers make it”
Page 59, paragraph 3: “Here are the steps we took, which are suggested as a program of recovery”
Meeting makers make meetings – nothing changes if nothing changes.
Around here (Oklahoma), we have several larger clubhouses where they meet 5 times or more a day and they might have a single G.S.R. It probably stems from the Kelley Club, the first structure built for the sole purpose of conducting A.A. meetings (This side of the Mississippi).
At a lot of these larger places, I’m not saying they do this at the Kelley Club, they usually open the meeting with the serenity prayer, “run down the 5 suggestions for the newcomer” and at the end of the meeting close with the Lords Prayer. The five suggestions are:
1. Get a big book & read it
2. Get a Sponsor and use them
3. Ask Higher Power for help in the Morning and night
4. Go to 90 meetings in 90 days
5. Just put the plug in the jug.
I attended many meetings during most of my sobriety at these clubs where that was the norm. I admit that I’ve even been the one to “run them down” for the newcomer a few times. But always in the back of my mind, I knew there was something that didn’t add up about it.
I don’t rattle off the five suggestions anymore because I know until the obsession was removed from me, there was no choice in whether I would drink or not. Once I began to work through the steps though, I looked up one day and realized it had been some time since I’d even thought of a drink! Then after working my way through the first 9 steps, I actually had a knee-jerk reaction to “recoil” from alcohol!
Having the obsession to drink completely removed is a miracle that not everyone gets to experience. I’m convinced as long as I continue to practice these principles and try to carry the message I’ll be alright. It’s worked so far for over 18 years and I suspect it will continue to work a lot longer.
Thanks again for the great blog.
PS Do you have something here about The Twelve Concepts?
I strongly agree with you markw.
Hi John,
I have the wonderful opportunity today to hear a friend’s Fifth Step so , even though I’d like to afford you a proper response it will be a short while until I can do that. I have to tell you tho’, that I appreciate your input a lot! And – I’ve been considering a new topic about the Concepts but I thought they’d be a bit thick for most folks. I’m going to tackle them anyway. Another thought might be – have you tackled them in writing? Personally? Could be an opportunity for a guest shot perhaps…
Hello Jerry Maguire – where’s the money????? J/K