A Small Milestone
September 10, 2006 by Kristina Chew, PhD
Filed under Health
“What time does the school close?”
The nurse who takes care of my in-laws and who lives with us said that to me this morning. She is from Ghana, with four children of her own, only one of whom lives here; she was offering to meet Charlie at the bus.
I had to pause before saying, “What a huge help that would be.”
It would be, and “huge” is a modest way to describe it. For the past five years, I have scheduled everything—my work schedule, in particular—around the moment when Charlie gets off from school. A single red light, a slow dump truck, the regular hazards of New Jersey traffic and I am in panic mode: In our old town, until we found a babysitter for the 15 minutes from when Charlie’s bus dropped him off to when I came home, I drove with an eye on the road and the other on the clock. And while the babysitter was kind-hearted and compassionate, she did not have specific training in taking care of a 75-pound autistic 8-year-old in full tantrum mode (resulting in one very tough moment with Charlie on the concrete of the porch).
Charlie’s worst behaviors—specifically, self-injurious behavior in the form of head-banging—have been greatly minimized thanks to being in his new school, applied behavior analysis (ABA)-based autism program and to his home Lovaas program (which also uses ABA). Not that the nurse knows ABA — we can train her, but I think (and it is another huge thing to say this) Charlie will be all right even if the nurse does not have ABA training.
It’s a small milestone for all of us.
And it is a reminder to me that reaching out to others to help with Charlie is always a great and a good thing.
Oh, my, I can identify with you! I have rushed home from work (school) every day or made arrangements since El Grande was 7, and he’s 14 now. He is gradually learning to handle a few minutes on his own if I am delayed or if his bus is early.
Does he let himself into the house? That is really great!
It has been a good thing, in more ways than one, to be living with extended family—with Charlie’s grandparents—it is really good to have more people around him.