Anger and Wrong Thinking – Partners

Anger is another topic that has received little play in meetings in this locale in recent memory. A lot can be written and said about anger by alcoholics. I am in full agreement with Mel B.;

“What really is behind a temper outburst? A temper explosion is not something that just blows up out of nowhere, a storm without a cause. It is actually a surface manifestation of inner hostility, of the emotions we often call ‘resentments’ in AA. I’ve learned that I am subject to moments of rage only if I allow myself to wallow around in a swamp of resentful, self-pitying thoughts. It is easy to become outwardly angry, for example, when I have spent several hours thinking about past mistakes, or going over how badly someone treated me in the past. I can also become angry over rejections or setbacks, or just about anything that threatens my security. I find, too, that considerable surface anger can be generated by reading or hearing things that arouse my indignation.”

I can identify with this completely.

That “split-second” fuse they told me about when I lost my temper existed because I gave the thing that I resented so much continuous, hopeless, thought. I couldn’t change it yet I thought somehow, some way, I could do something about it. Like, my father. Didn’t change him in the least. Nor did it change all those bosses. And it never changed my wife. Never changed the finances or the electric company either.

Working on changing my thinking changed something – me. I’d love to wish I could go back and fix all those things but my thinking has changed. Today I understand I can’t change the past and there’s a good reason for that.

“Be still and know He is God.”