While I shall still be very much a part of the Splendicity family – you can find me at EBeautyDaily, ShopaholicsDaily, and the hair channel over there – this shall be my last Blistree Relationships post.

The absolutely fabulous Kelli DesRochers will be taking my place, and she will have some fun contests coming up for you very soon – along, with, I’m sure, tons of fun relationship/sex chat!

I, however, will be sure to comment all the time with updates on my own (nonexistent) love life.

Speaking of my love life, I watched He’s Not That Into You last night…two times. (The beauties of In Demand cable!)  I realized, after the second watching, it actually ain’t all that depressing…it’s actually rather inspirational! I couldn’t help but identify with though.

And while i realize it’s six months too late to write a review of this movie, I’m writing something of  a revelation – a burst of clarity, if you will.

Basically, this is the first movie ever that I’ve seen that’s actually truly about love. As is it really is. And it’s also about dating – and the ugly truth behind it. Us women have to stop lying to ourselves. If a guy wants to call you, he will. If he likes you, he will make the effort. And if he doesn’t, that means he’s not interested.

And this seems SO obvious to me, now, after seeing the movie, and yet, simultaneously, I’m consulting my friend’s magic 8 ball for its views on if the guy who hasn’t called in two weeks is maybe possibly interested after all.

I most identified with Ginnifer Goodwin, who played a serial first-dater (by no fault of her own beyond delusional optimism.)  Gigi (Goodwin) has no defenses, gives too much, talks too much and spends a lot of time sitting by the phone.

That is me!!

And so, much like when I know that carbs are bad and yet eat a bagel, I know that I am crazy and a walking cliche, and yet…am doing nothing different. I’m inspired, but still hoping that I, too, will be the”exception”.  I wonder how any of you have responded to the movie?

Image: Sxc.hu

Post from: Blisstree

He’s Not That Into You – In a New Light

I sometimes wonder if it’s me being melodramatic, or if it’s accurate that while I have a lot of people in my life, and a lot of activities to share in, I have very few quality relationships. I am no one’s best friend. There’s no one who sees me as their great love.

In general, I feel like I have a lot of acquaintances, a few friends, and literally no one that I can talk to about everything on my mind, and know I will get an open, non-judgmental ear. I want that so badly – but then I wonder, is that asking too much?

I try to be that person to the people who are important to me. Am always there for them when they go through breakups, or job stress, or life dramas. And they are sort of there for me, but never to the degree. Do I just give too much? Or am I giving what isn’t even being asked for?

I’d love to see your thoughts – do you see you have unequal friendships? Do you get what you give? Do you expect to?

It’s interesting how in dating, there is “the rules” and “the secret”…but in friendship, we pretty much take it, or leave it, as it goes.

Image: Sxc.hu

Post from: Blisstree

Levels of Friendship

My friends at Zoosk.com emailed recently with some great tips, I figured they were worth considering and chatting about!

1. Show what you are all about.

The idea is to put yourself in the best light, but also to show your true personality. List your favorite songs instead of saying something like “I like alternative rock.”

2. Use spell check!

Don’t type lyk u spended teh laste 10 yeers uv ur lyfe doin IM. Your computer has spell check. Use it. A sloppy profile reflects poorly on you as a person. It implies that you don’t care or are not putting much effort into finding a date. We know that is not true because why else would you maintain an online dating profile?

3. Keep your profile updated.

I have a tendency to get lazy in my own dating profile, and that’s dumb. Sure, you have created a profile and uploaded a picture, but that ain’t gonna cut it. On a weekly basis, make updates to your profile. Add new pictures and new information about your interests. If you can’t commit to your dating profile, how will you to dating???

Image: Sxc.hu

Post from: Blisstree

Online Dating Tips

Her friend and her were driving along a northeast highway when a trucker honked at them from the next lane.

A transcript of her tweets. “Some man just drove past our car blowing kisses. Then he drove past with a sign, show me your boobs. Not even kidding.”

“We gave him the finger. He deserved it!”

Now, seriously – if there are any men reading this, help me out – why would you do this? Why do construction workers whistle? Do any of you think that acting in this way will make a woman actually be interested in you? Like really?

Women may sometimes go for guys that don’t treat them very well, but there’s a line between rugged charm and being a loser. Learn it, and you may actually score a girl.

Image: Sxc.hu

Post from: Blisstree

How Not to Pick Up a Girl

It’s really interesting how, when living with your parents, you are eager to get away from them, and then as soon as you move out, they become sort of…cool.

Anyway, in another one of my blogs, I am running a contest where readers have to share their most romantic moment. My mom told my dad about it, and said she had wanted to enter, but couldn’t think of a romantic moment to share.

They enjoyed a playful banter for the remainder of the day, where they each tried to conjure up a moment. The end result was that in thirty-two years of marriage, they had not had any moments.

I think the truth is that they have a constant moment – this is a couple that after three decades, still eats dinner together every night, and watches TV together each evening, and boast that they share a pillow.

I think just that they can’t pick out a specific moment sort of suggests they are never not romantic. Or maybe I’m just biased. :-

Image: Sxc.hu

Post from: Blisstree

Your Most Romantic Moment

Everyone will have a different answer. Sometimes, I will say that my key to happiness is to not feel alone – because when I feel that way, it is when I feel the most lost in the abyss, and when I am surrounded by love – be it platonic or romantic – do I feel happy.

I have friends who find happiness in material wealth. Some find happiness of food, or sex, or something entirely different.

My puppies? A good greenie.

Researchers at the University of Rochester, NY recently researched this subject, and discovered that for many, money, looks, and even fame, don’t actually create happiness. The study showed that the acquisition of external goals not only didn’t bring about the sense of happiness expected, but in many cases actually brought unhappiness. Students who achieved internally focused goals such as personal growth and strong relationships were significantly happier.

This makes a lot of sense, and actually gives us something to think about. So, I ask you – what is the key to your own personal happiness?

Image: Sxc.hu

Post from: Blisstree

The Secrets of True Happiness

My dentist – a highly attractive, but much older, married man, has asked me out to dinner. He wants to consult with me about some social networking he may be doing for the memoirs he is writing.

I had assumed we would meet at a restaurant, but he just emailed and suggest we meet at his apartment, because he has wi-fi there, and then after that, we’d find something “yummy”.

At face value, it makes sense. One can not look at a computer screen and talk biz while sipping margaritas and eating chips.

But then that paranoid person inside me – the one in the dating scene – is like…huh? What’s THIS about?

Image: Sxc.hu

Post from: Blisstree

Margaritas or Mayhem?

I’d react with a body slam, but in the book I am checking out, How to Instantly Connect with Anyone, Leil Lowndes offers tips and insight on how to respond without spewing suspicion-fueled obscenities because, after all, it might just be an innocent mistake.

(Not sure HOW. But whatev.)

But the issue existing made me curious – has it ever happened to any of you? How did YOU react?

I personally think at the point of that, there better be a GOOD reason, or I wouldn’t be caring about damaging the relationship!

Image: mhprofessional.com

Post from: Blisstree

When Your Partner Calls You the Wrong Name

That said, when we are NOT invited to a wedding we really feel like we should have been invited to…what is our recourse?

Without going into a long and winding tale, an old friend of mine is getting married next month – a friend who as soon as he got into this current relationship, basically began to ONLY spend time with his girlfriend, and disappeared off the radar. So, to that end, we’ve hardly spoken in a year…but before that, would talk all the time, and never had a falling out or any complications of any sort.

All our mutual friends are invited to the wedding. Every last one. And so, my not being invited feels almost like an exclusion, more than simply a matter of numbers.

The wedding will be really small, it’s to be a brunch held in the garden of a nearby restaurant, and so, numbers are limited, to be sure. The mutual friends are closer – my best friend is also friends with the bride, and the other friends have known him longer and better.

I may not have a leg to stand on, and in fact, I realize I have no right to complain – but I still feel just sad! Like it’s high school again, and I was the only one not invited to the cool afterprom party.

Alas.

Image: Sxc.hu

Post from: Blisstree

Where’s My Invite?

Get this: According to a recent study published in the June issue of Contraception Magazine, the “Pull Out” method of birth control rivals the use of condoms!

This was a piece published by sex researcher Rachel K. Jones, that finds  “pulling out” before ejaculation is nearly effective as condoms in preventing pregnancy – calling the method “only slightly less effective” than condoms.

Wow.

This is not a good thing.

It’s like millions of college boys are suddenly going to feel validated to not wear condoms and spread disease far and wide.

Image: Sxc.hu

Post from: Blisstree

The Pull Out Method Rivals Condoms?!?