Because I Just Want To Live!

Having searched through my alky mind for a quick-witted response to our neighborhood troll Micky/David/Patrick/Whatever and his insanity/stupidity, coming up with nothing more than immaturity on my part, I began looking around some of my “favorite” places and found Barefoots’ Place once again.

Thought about referring to The Akron Manual which was reprinted at Barefoot’s to give us an idea how the oldtimers did it in the beginning but I decided on this – “The Insanity Of Alcohol.” Ya’ see Micky, you have some worth – you motivated my mind to what could kill me and I used the tools. Now I’ll pass on what I can…

What exactly is “The Insanity Of Alcohol?” Do you believe it is the “goofy,” or silly behavior we all exhibit when we’re drinking? It isn’t. If it were, everyone would have to join AA who had consumed a bit too much. The Insanity Of Alcohol, for an alcoholic – “is the alcoholic’s persistent return to alcohol in the face of overwhelming evidence that it is destroying his or her life, over and over again.”

“It is our physical as well as our mental response to alcohol that is INSANE, and that is what separates the alcoholic from the non-alcoholic.”

“What Dr. Silkworth called the ‘phenomenon of craving,’ manifesting as an ‘allergy,’ is so overpowering that all else comes in second to our primary concern of getting the next drink, even life itself takes second place.”

Even life itself takes second place grabs MY personal attention! I’d love to say it’s hard today to imagine that I had placed my family, their lives and mine on the back burner when I drank but that’s exactly what I did and admitting anything less would be lying. I hear a lot of folks attempting to rationalize themselves past this one!

To quote from Barefoot;

“As a young man (with tears in his eyes) in his first AA meeting said:

‘I’m here because I just want to live … that’s it … I just want to live’

It is as Simple as that!!!”