Celebrating an anorexic’s road to recovery is dang hard!
June 30, 2008 by angelique
Filed under Women's Health
I have an acquaintance who is finally pulling herself out of Ana’s sphere of influence. She’s looking healthier than I’ve ever known her to be, and I can see she’s gained a bit of weight.
However, knowing that almost anything said can be a trigger, I’m only cautiously congratulating her on her path to recovery. Phrases I’d like to use but know better than to utter include:
- “You look great!” (She might interpret that as “You look fat!”)
- “You look so much healthier.” (She might interpret that the same way as the previous phrase.)
- “I’m so glad you’re eating.” (No way would I say this. Not gonna happen.)
So instead, I’ve simply smiled and said, “How is it going? What’s new?” Innocuous, but unlikely to cause her to take a step back.
What would you say? (Remember — this isn’t a close friend, just someone I know. She’s talked opening about her eating disorder, but I still don’t feel that I’m anywhere near the “inner circle” of friends.)
I wouldn’t mention anything at all about her appearance at this time; it’s much too soon.
You are right on about just asking her how she is and what’s new. Very considerate of you!
anorexia is also attributed to body dysmorphic disorder in which she sees her body differently than we do. it is really hard to convince someone witht this disease that they are indeed fine.
Erika:
I saw her again today. We just talked. Nothing too deep or personal. And it was very, very nice not to leave a conversation with her wondering if she’d be around in a few days. (I used to be very concerned about that.)
Angelique
ArthritisTreatment:
Agreed.
Congrats to you, Angelique. It was not only sensitive of you to ask, but even more so to follow through. You may have preserved a friendship, without even realizing it.