CLUE 6. How and when does it end?
February 14, 2006 by gayla
Filed under Relationships
Infatuation: it stops the same way it starts – FAST.
The few things you do like about the other person – even those strongly held at first – begin to wear thin. All those other things you don’t have in common begin more and more to rear their ugly heads and become more and more obvious. You begin to quarrels, conflicts, even fights, and then doubts about your “love.”
Soon you break up, UNLESS you and your partner become involved in mutually satisfying sexual relations. Then sex will frustrate the usual test of time. A good sexual relationship may hold a couple together as long as three to five years. But that’s about it. Sex alone will not keep a couple together longer than that. MAKING UP THE TEST OF TIME if you are already involved in satisfying sex relations by stop doing it.
Real Love: it stops slowly.
It will take long time to end a relationship and it will take long time to get over it. Love involves meshing many, many facets of two personalities. You grow together and become a unit. The person becomes a basic part of you, of your own personality. If a break comes, you are just not going to be the same. In fact, you may never quite get over it for as long as you live. That does not mean that you cannot love again. Social scientists are certain that there are a number of persons in this world with whom each of us normally can have a genuine, deep-seated love that will last.
Though you may never get over this “real love” that has ended, you do need to take time to focus on how to deal with this aspect of your life so that it has little weight in future relationships. For example – if this partner has broken down your trust to a degree – you may carry an anti-trust factor into your new relationship. Does that person deserve to take the blame for something another person did? No! Until you are readily able to open your heart to trusting again, you haven’t learned to deal with the previous love and it’s likely the relationship will never flourish into anything substantial.
