Combating Selfish Behavior – Part 2

“Mine! Mine! Mine!”

OK, I’ve got you back in the correct frame of mind to discuss selfishness. If you’ve been enduring a rough patch in your house with this sort of behavior, then I’m sorry for adding to your pain

In Part 1, I shared what I thought the root cause of selfishness was: a distorted perspective. Now, in Part 2, I’ll offer a few ideas that I came up with for helping kids maintain a healthy perspective on life. Please share your ideas in the comments below.

One caveat: I don’t think there’s much you can do when you’re in the middle of a tantrum. Once reason has been thrown out, all you can do is wait for it to return. These ideas focus on laying a healthy foundation that will minimize selfish attitudes.

Onto the list.

• Give. OK, let’s get the obvious out of the way. You, as a parent need to be generous. If you’re selfish, odds are your kids will be selfish, too. You need to be generous. And you need to let your kids see it. They’ll ask questions, which is exactly what you want. Once you’re talking you can shape their minds.
• Get them giving. Kids accumulate stuff. Birthday gifts, Holiday presents, surprises from the grandparents; trinkets from Happy Meals. How about instituting a recycling policy? For every new toy they get, have them select one old toy to give. It probably won’t be a big hardship on them, as they likely have toys that they have outgrown. Then, take those toys with you on the next idea…
• Volunteer. Get out with the kids and volunteer. Serve at a soup kitchen. Adopt a grandparent at the retirement center. Head to the women’s shelter and play with the kids living there. The more affluent you are, the more important this is. If your children only ever see other wealthy people, then their perspective on life will be skewed. The more diverse their surroundings and the more broad the range of people they meet and interact with, the better off they’ll be.
• Make a diversity cube. This idea comes from the Akron Beacon Journal. It might seem a bit dinky, but I like the idea for two reasons. First, it’s something you can do with your kids, and time together is an opportunity to talk. (Remember Terry and Isabella Jackson!) Second, it helps kids realize the world is full of different people. Anything that does this is great in my book. As a parent you can and must guide them.

That should get us started. What ideas do you have?