Common Dating Fears

I’ve always said that dating is not for the faint of heart. It takes guts. There is rejection, patience, stepping outside your comfort zone… and that’s all with trying to figure out if the person you are with is the right one for you. It can be a lot.

Most people have these fears and date anyway. What’s the alternative? For a select few, however, dating can cause some serious anxiety. Following are common dating fears that singles have shared with me, along with a few tips that should help.

Fear of Rejection
This is the biggie. Asking someone out puts a lot of pressure on the person doing the asking. No one likes being rejected, laughed out, or simply told “no.”

Ease the fear: Don’t give rejection the weight of the world. Understand that everyone, and I mean everyone, has been rejected by a date at some point. If the person you’re asking out is unkind, remember that is their issue and not yours. Feel sorry for someone that tries to put you down, because if you keep trying to ask someone out you will meet someone great, whereas the one who laughed at you will most likely still be alone.

Fear of Online Dating
For every person that tells me online dating has worked well for them, I usually have one or two more that think it’s too scary to try. The biggest complaints are that there are weirdos online or that someone at work will find out you are online.

Ease the fear: Never worry about what other people think about you dating online. First of all, it’s none of their business. So don’t tell them. Instead, go forth with the knowledge that in six months time you will likely have met the right one. That person teasing you won’t be laughing when you are happily with someone special.

Fear of Being Alone
This fear is the one that drives singles together when they should take some time on their own. People settle when they are afraid to be by themselves for any length of time.

Ease the fear: Look at your time alone as a gift. When you meet someone serious, you will at some point crave alone time. Use the time spent by yourself to get to know exactly what you what in a mate. Only then will you be able to attract the right one to you.

Image: sxc.hu.