Damn Right – It Is Life Or Death!
May 29, 2007 by Mark
Filed under Diseases & Conditions
I’ve been here long enough and was personally preached at often enough to know that you can’t scare an alkie straight. “Frothy emotional appeal seldom suffices.”
That doesn’t change the fact that alcoholism is a deadly disease. Or a deadly condition or a deadly state of mind, whatever you care to call it. (That’s for those smart alecks who want recovery their way…)
“The idea that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing. Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death.”
Last night we heard from a “newcomer” who took a geographical in order to “fix” himself. He’d been in AA for three years in his old neighborhood and had managed to put two years together. Here for only a short time and now he has his first DUI. Which raises my personal curiosity. How can you sit in meetings for almost three years, call yourself an alcoholic and not truly finally admit it to your innermost self, go out and drink again, get your first DUI and seemingly not know that
Wherever You Go You’ll Find Yourself There!
Oh – you weren’t really paying attention. I understand. [Dripping with sarcasm... admittedly]
You weren’t by any chance one of those folks who was talking to your friend during the readings were you? Yeah – making it difficult for others to pay attention. Or, are you now one of those who could have made it possible for those newcomers to hear what they needed to hear by not talking during the readings?
You aren’t one of those by chance who shows up late, shuffles through the coffee pot, shuffles into the meeting while a topic is being presented, grabs your seat and makes enough noise to drown out whoever is speaking, then shares endlessly on a topic of your own choosing when the rotation moves around to you? Then wonder why you find yourself alone afterwards?
Perhaps you’re the one who takes such offense at being corrected also? Who takes offense that an oldtimer mentions to you that there are those here who are trying to listen to get sober and live! Would you mind keeping the noise down?
Could it be that you are an oldtimer who says that they’d never recommend doing a Fifth Step with another member of AA? Please – read pages 73-75 where we find specific directions for sharing our Fifth Step including: “When we decide who is to hear our story, we waste no time. We have a written inventory and we are prepared for a long talk. We explain to our partner what we are about to do and why we have to do it. He should realize that we are engaged upon a life-and-death errand. Most people approached in this way will be glad to help; they will be honored by our confidence.”
Of course, if I’m looking for a material solution to a spiritual problem, I’m going to wind up with a lot of frustration and despair.
My favorite is on PG 85 of the book Alcoholics Anonymous:
It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition. Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God’s will into all of our activities. “How can I best serve Thee-Thy will (not mine) be done.” These are thoughts which must go with us constantly. We can exercise our will power along this line all we wish. It is the proper use of the will.
Quite simply, it tells me that if I’m more concerned about what I can get out of life, rather than look for what I can contribute, I’m “just not drinkin”. I’m looking for that material stuff to fix me and I’m missing the boat. I used to hear people say “there are no musts in A.A. and I even believed them for a while… Till I actually sat down and read the book myself!
Trust me, I fall short more days than I’d like to admit. I know when things get a little awkward, I dig into the situation to see what I can do to help. Be it hold the door, wipe the sink and toilet down in the bathroom, carry out the trash or spend a few minutes with the new person (even though there are probably a dozen more qualified AAs in my group that could talk to him).
Hope thats along the same lines…
Sounds like big-time denial to me. The disease is cunning, baffling and powerful – and capable of protecting me from seeing the result of my insanity – even when the evidence is right under my nose!
I’ve been in recovery over five years, and am only now really getting that, no matter what I do, I can’t escape myself, and that recovery truly is an inside job. Maybe I’m a slow learner!
John – you’re right on target as usual!
Thanks bopgirl – you are also on point – and welcome!
Life and death , you bet ,,, totaly off point
I have a pigeon who’s consular will not release him until he finds out what the “100 tools of AA” are ? frantic the new comer calls me I get a puzzled look on my face {my usal disguise } and say what ? I ve been around a little while and have not heard of this , I asked some that have been hear longer then I , they too have not heard of this , perhaps a fishing trip for the newbie ? any thought anyone ?
sorry spell check out
The first 100 or the second 100? lmao….. never heard of them – aaaaahhhhh – but we have ways of looking up such things….. let’s see?
AA History Lovers has a search function. Nope, no results for either “100 tools of AA” or for “Tools of AA.” Ah HA!!! Take a look at my next post…