Dating Advice For the Divorced Man

I found an interesting article for divorced men who are re-entering the dating scene. It’s written by Leah Ingram for Match.com. If you know a divorced man, who could use some help, then you might share the list with him. For some reason, men find us women complicated, on occasion. Silly, silly guys. Women aren’t that tough to get.

Divorced Guys: 8 Dating Rules

• Rule #1: Women want to be listened to and heard.
• Rule #2: Women expect some level of chivalry, even in our modern world.
• Rule #3: Women want compatibility, so emphasize your common ground early in the relationship.
• Rule #4: Don’t rush the physical side of the relationship.
• Rule #5: Women don’t want to hear about your ex, at least not right away.
• Rule #6: Look the part.
• Rule #7: Women are listeners, not fixers, and want their men to be the same.
• Rule #8: Women want to know if you’re NOT interested in seeing her again.

I agree with all of the rules, but some things, like men being “fixers,” that’s their nature. At some point, we’ve got to let men be men. If a guy is giving you unsolicited advice, he’s trying to be useful or helpful. Just smile politely, nod your head, and hear him out. He might have something good and if he doesn’t, so what. It doesn’t hurt to listen.

On the subject of letting a woman know when a man is not interested, well that’s never going to be a comfortable situation.  I agree that it’s polite to let someone know – nobody likes to wait and wonder – but do it gently. I went on a walking date with a guy and I thought he seemed okay, I could picture myself kissing him at some point in the future (my personal attraction measurement).  We said goodbye and then later he sent me an email saying that he enjoyed our walk, but he felt we were not a good match. He rejected me, but he didn’t embarrass me by saying to my face, hey I’m really not attracted to you. I felt that his no thank you email was a gentle approach.

I think both sexes need to avoid the ex-talk as much as possible. If you can’t stop talking about an ex, then you head is most likely full of thoughts about that person, and you probably aren’t ready to begin dating someone new. Give yourself some time to get it right and you will be doing you both a favor.