Dealing with Lazy Teens
I’ve got a not-so-fun situation on my hands. Three of the four kids we have are lazy — while two are lazy extraordinaire. And to be honest, I am really struggling lately with the feeling taken advantage of — It seems most everything I do as a loving parent is more expected and not appreciated. In fact, most times I feel like they don’t give a damn about helping to make my job a little easier.
- Three things that rub me the wrong way and absolutely irritate the hell out of me are:
- To be sorting clothes for SIX people and have clothes half right and half wrong side out.
- To have the sink empty of dirty dishes at night only to wake up the next morning to having to clear a sink full of dirty dishes before I can even make my first pot of coffee.
- To place clean and neatly folded clothes on beds and for the kids to just throw them in the floor to make room for them to sit on their bed to play a Gameboy.
Am I being overly picky?
Caring for SIX people isn’t an easy job! Is it really too much to ask that they help make my jobs a bit easier by putting their dishes in the dishwasher, turning their clothes right side out and putting clean clothes away?
Does anyone have a creative suggestion or 10 that I might use to get the kids a little more motivated to get off the couch and do something?
My husband and I have discovered that the kids prefer to do things half-assed in hopes that we may never call on them to do it again because we can’t trust them to do it right.
The one we do have that is a little workaholic and clean freak feels like he’s doing it all while the others do nothing. And that’s not fair either.
I can’t stand a filthy house! I can’t stand clutter and I can’t stand laziness.
What’s a mom to do?
Suggestions?
Tags: parenting, teens, lazy teens, chores, reward, parent discussions
apple and the stick seems to come to mind….
I have the exact problem – AND my mother and ex-husband meddle telling my husband and I “they’re just kids, you expect too much” HELP!!!!!!!!!!!
My daughter is 5, my son is 2, and when I tell them to do something, by god they better get up off their butts and do it or the belt comes out AND they lose privileges. My best friend has 3 kids, one is a real whiner at 4 years old and is still firmly “on-the-tit”, one has to be told 3 times or more to do anything at all and questions her authority at every turn, and her oldest lives on the computer day and night while he should be visiting with and spending time with his mom who misses him the entire remainder of the year. In fact he won’t get off the computer for anyone to use it without leaving MAJOR processor hogging programs running, making it pointless to even get on for how bad it lags. He’s got a filthy mouth, he’s lazy, and today when I took all the kids to the pool, he refused to give his mom any alone time, which is why I was taking the kids. The whiney little runt also refused to go. She really needs to learn how to be more confrontational. Her children display no respect for her, and it severely pisses me off to see them treating her like this.
beat the shit out of the little fuckers. theres no incentive like a broomstick to the face.
Best advice I’ve seen all day!
Put your lazy husband to work!
Beating children? Belt? WTF, it is never okay to hit a child, it only teaches them that it is okay to hit others, and not to trust the parent. parents that abuse thier children with whippings and the like only do so because they have issues of control that stem back to childhood because they themselves experienced the same thing! dont do what your parents did people! You have to give these kids a choice between A or B, A=do the right thing get reward
B=do wrong thing choose to loose priveledges. but the biggest problem today is parents that do not follow through with the dicipline that they promised this is why children have no respect. that is the parents fault not the childs. And I dont know about you but I have never respected or trusted ANYONE who hit me!
The above answers are rediculous. Lazy teens are lazy do to lack of disipline and consistancy. Lay down the law. Write down weekly chores. Talk to them about respect of you and others, enlighten them that the world will not be as toerate as it is at home and the day will come when thy have to pursue independent responsibility. Wake up call time – If they are old enough to drive and go out responsibily then can be responsible to clena up after themselves. I told my teen I would not trust her to drive the car until she showed she can be responsible under my roof. That means respect for me, the things that are provided for her and she needed to show that she can be responsible for taking care of herself and that starts at home. Kick your teen in the butt..being “grown up” means responsibility and respect. It starts at home..if they don’t do it..they get no more of my items such as the car or a little cash if needed. Teens think they are grwon up…let them prove it!
i also have a 15 year old that drives me nuts. she wants me to give her freedom but cant even take a birth control pill every day without being told every single day!!! she nevers cleans her room unless she is told to and then its a half hearted effort. i have put my foot down with her . i am not going to tell her 5 times to do something , or have her come back with a attitude that i am just the dumbest strickest parent out there. i dont know why some people on here are writing saying that dont wope your kids, what kind of crap is that … you need to get your bible out and read it, its says in black and white spare the rod and spoil the child……… that is what is wrong with the kids today there are so many parents not doing what he said to do . if your kids need discpiline than they should get it . got to many people running around saying dont spank your kids it might affect them , well i got my ass woped when i was growning up and yea it affected me i learned to do the right thing and its keep me from alot of bad mistakes that i might have made if i didnt get the belt every now and then. so please dont tell other parents its not ok to spank that is just rediculious!!!! yes there are childern that are being abused and yes they are truley being done a injustice, but that aint the case at my house there is a difference in a good ole ass woping and a beating!! matter fact i believe old doctor spock said dont wope your kids well guess what his son commited sucide hmmmm dont think i need advise from himm lol anyways idont think there is a parent out there that dont go thru the same issues with there kids and teenagers , just gotta hang in there and stand your ground and they will thank you some day and might even keep them safe and out of prision system
I’m a teenager. I know that i can be very lazy, which is how i stumbled across this page. Some teenagers, i feel, don’t do things because they feel depressed or bad about themselves. However, this is not an excuse for not doing anything. Some teenagers just need to be understood, and some just need help. I wish my mom would HELP me learn how to keep my room clean.
But i also agree that parents must disipline their child as early as possible. I’m 17 now, and i KNOW that if my parents were stricter with me when i was 12 or 13, I wouldn’t be as lazy as i am now. I’ll try to change, cause i know i have to grow up one day. I just wish i had a little help and a little push sometimes.
Wow, out of all the posts here – I think “whereswaldoagain” has the advice I’ll try. I have a 19 year old high school drop out who is either scared of the world or just plain lazy as hell (actually, the lazy part is obvious). He won’t get a job, won’t clean his room, has a conniption fit anytime he’s asked to do something (although he is getting a little better there), and he spends 90% of his time on the computer. Whatever happened to GET A LIFE?! We tried all of the things suggested – loss of priveleges, chore lists, spanking (not lately – he’s bigger than me now…), and we DID follow through! It’s like he doesn’t care. He doesn’t come from a broken home, he’s not lacking in any of his needs – maybe a few wants, but no needs. He doesn’t drive or have a license because that is HOW lazy he is. I just don’t get it…when I was younger than him I was chomping at the bit to get the hell away from my parents. Hmmm…maybe they’ve just got it too good today.
One more thing – as for nana vine…you never had kids did you?