Does Your Tween Have Highlights?
Back when I was a tween, I remember the big thing was the girls getting their hair permed, but these days it seems that highlights, tints and extensions are all the rage with tweens, teens and adults.
My 9 year old daughter is becoming very fashion aware this year and spending a lot more time in front of the mirror, taking note of celeb styles, and caring what her friends are doing as well. At least twice this past year she has asked about getting her hair highlighted. I have always said no, but I’d love to hear your thoughts on the topic!
If you have let your tween daughter get highlights, extensions or other hair treatments, how much do you allow? Do you pay for them or does your daughter? Do you do the treatments at home or in the salon? Do you feel pressured by your daughter to let her have them done?
If you don’t allow the treatments, I’d love to know why. Does your daughter want to get them done because her friends have them? Is there an age where you feel hair treatments are okay, or occasions where they are fine?
Up to this point I have always told my daughter no. I just feel like she has her whole adult life (and her own money then) to be creative with her hair. I get highlights put in my hair – but didn’t do so until I was in my late 20s. I might reconsider when she is in high school, but for now, I’d just like to keep her a little girl as long as I can.
I have given her highlights in the past – and even tried to give her a blond/brown haircolor like Jamie Lynn Spears in her Nickelodeon show – but that was a disaster and I had to pull her out of school for a day so I could fix it.
Goodness, there is a lot of pressure on tweens today. We have some 12 and 13 year old girls at church that have dyed their hair numerous times, gotten highlights, and such. One girl even got blue highlights.
I probably won’t allow my daughter to go to such an extent. It’s easy now to say I won’t, because she’s only 4, but more than likely I won’t be changing my mind.
I enjoy playing with my own hair. Some colors I we’ve done in the past have included red, brown, blond and pink.
Usually, I’m getting a new color in my hair and my 6 year old asks if she can have it too.
I can’t think of a reason why not. I make sure not to violate school rules so we used more daring colors before school started and during summers. She currently has blond highlights.
But then my baby boy has a mohawk too.
It’s just fun.
I don’t see a problem with it, other than the expense involved (unless you do it at home yourself) as long as it’s in semi-natural colors like blonde or red. A couple of years ago when my daughter was 9, we had a wedding to go to. It just happened to be time for me to get my roots done, so we had a girl day and went to the salon. I let her get blonde highlights that day. She hasn’t shown any interest since, but if she wanted them I’d do it for her at home.
My daughter is now a teen, but when she was 11 we put some bright crayon-red highlights in her hair. She is very creative and doing something like that fit her personality. Now she wears her hair very dark. I also have a 9 year old and I don’t do anything like that with her hair – it’s long, dark, and straight.
Yes, I’ve allowed Isreal as a pre-teen and now as a teen to get highlights. Usually we pay 1/2 and 1/2 but now that she is 16 and working part time she pays for it all. Isreal is very expressive in her dress, hair and style and she loves her fashion statment and I love that she expresses herself WHILE still covering all important parts – so, to me, if she want hightlights or another color – I’m all for it. Here is a recent pic taken of her after her last color change (about 2 weeks ago) http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v16/Aurelia/IsrealRed.jpg
My tween has been asking. I think your
better off experimenting now now before
she gets alot older. The reds and blues
are not highlights that would be okay
if he has a job in the public eye, unless
of course she’s a pop star!
My tween happens to be a boy – and even he has brought up the idea for his own hair, which I immediately nixed. I tell him when his hair turns gray…. My daughter is still in preschool but when she is a tween my answer will be the same.
My tween is also a boy and the thought has even entered his head, but I am with Neena, if it does come up it will not be something that I would allow at this age. The pressure to be something thet your not starts so young now, and it may seem like it is only changing the colour of your hair, but then what comes next? What else do they change about themselves? I would like my children to accept themselves 100% for what they are at this early age in their life.
I think letting them change this thing about themselves allows them to express themselves, try on new aspects of their personalities and explore their own sense of self without permanent consequences.
The good thing about hair is that there is nothing permanent about it. It grows back in its original form – always. There is plenty of room to allow them to experience regret. Hair is a safe ground for experimentation.
Unless they are Boys – by the time they’re allowed to be experimental with their own style or sense of self when they grow up – well, they might be on their way to balding! poor souls. JK
I think it’s a great bribe option. Even with the boys, they’ve liked getting tips or fades from time to time. I don’t make them “pay for it” so much as I make them earn it.
At the beginning of school I had one with brown hair and dramatic highlights while the other has blonde hair and went with a dark sable dramatic fade. It really did look very nice.
With my husbands daughter, we had a tri-color highlight and lowlight done and it looked Beautiful!
I’ve always been a big “hair” person and having taken such interest in the style and color of my own (I also do the tri-color highlight and lowlights) I can’t as easily tell my kids no. Especially when there are so many kids who take NO interest in their appearance. I’m glad mine do.
I think 11 or 12 is a pretty good age to start with that IF they are interested – if not, I wouldn’t mention it.
My 11 yo girl gets to put funky highlights (pink, blue, etc) in the summer time, and when school rolls back around we put more natural looking colors in to replace them. My husband pays for it for both of us (mine are more natural colors). Kids don’t get to control a whole lot in their lives, (at least mine doesn’t!) so I let her have her freedom here.
what is the best color to give my child highlights she is a mexican/black.
My friend is of dark Arab descent, and she has to have the natural color of her hair removed in order for the “funky” colors to stand out. My girl has light brown hair and we have to do the same thing if she wants really bright colors. If your child is really young, you might want to consider a few extensions instead of the harsh chemicals.
Hmmm … my nine y.o. had head lice for two years in a row. We both ended up cutting our waist-length hair to really short crops to get rid of it, as traditional remedies weren’t working (NIX, RID, prescription shampoos, vacuuming, spraying, etc etc NOTHING worked). So we both cut our hair short – BOY short. As long as she has boy-short hair, she’s allowed to have it any and I mean ANY color she wants. We’ve done pink, red, purple and blue. The school protested, but I had a conversation with the principal about how the school refused to do class head-checks THREE times after I called to let them know, they haven’t said a word. As long as she keeps her hair short and low-maintenance, she can have whatever color she wants – I’ll even do “stripes” LOL
My child is 11. I let her get highlights whenever her old ones fade. I am totally with letting her express herself. If she dies it a color she doesn’t like, it was her decision. It may sound mean, but it keeps her from doing anything she will regret.
It doesn’t matter only because it should be the right kind of hair product.
We have black hair so it’s hard to find the right product for African-American hair.
But yes I would allow it but it can’t make her hair fall out or anything.
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I just highlighted my 12-year-old daughter’s hair last week. It was light brown to start out with and when we got finnished, the highlights looked nice and natural. If she wants highlights, do a color close to her natural color, but a little lighter. It will look perfect for summer!
My 10 year old has been asking me for highlights-way too young in my opinion. I told her she could have them if she paid for them-that took care of it. I can’t believe the things that girls have to go through at school-wait-I guess I can after seeing some of the Moms at the school my daughter attends. No wonder we have so many problems with our youth.
I think its a grate way for them to express themself. I let my 16 year old die her hair and my 14 year old started asking when she was 10, I let he die her hair twice but now she wants streaks done. My sister is willing to do it at her home because she thinks it will look grate on her. I personaly don’t think she should get it done but its her choice she will do it sooner or later and I prefer her to do it sooner. I say let them do it if they pay for it, or they can forget it.
I cannot believe how many young girls are getting all of these harsh chemical processes done! I am a 22 year old hairstylist and I feel so uncomfortable when I see such a young pretty 11 year old girl in the chair next to me getting blonde highlights! I think they should wait until high school at least! Little girls are losing their youth younger and younger…I suggest adding in a couple of fun extensions for sure. Ps. as far as perms, they are far more damaging than color in most cases.
i think that pre-teens should be able to get highlight ( only) becuase it gives them confidence and not only bringing their on sense of style im turning 13 on the 16 of december and im thinking about get a carme lcolor highlights with my dark brown hair becuase its more natural looking then grown
I think 11 year olds should be able to get highlights b-cause it gives them confidence. My 11 year old is getting them but what color she wants either blonde, gold or funky colors any suggestions???
I am 11. My best friend has hair-stylist parents. My mom said i could get them when i was 13, but i was thinking of getting dark blond low-lights this summer, i want to ask for them for my birthday =). I got a perm going into 5th grade and it didnt horribly damage my hair. Well i guess it kinda did, but it was really long and i wanted it cut so-voila! It worked out fine and now i am growing it out again. If you reeealy dont want ur kid to get highlights/lowlights then at Claire’s they have hair mascara and hair sticks. They have them in pink and light blue. You only have to do one or two streaks. Plus it comes out in like two washes. I am gonna get some. At ‘Kids Hair’ they also have ‘hair streakers’ in red, blue, green, pink, etc. If you dont trust ‘Kids Hair’ then-wow.
I’m a 11 year old girl turnin 12 in a few months and i want highlights really bad but my mom said i have to wait till im 13. i think its fine at the age 12 and up. i want them for my birthday because its in the summer so it wont matter school wise. i was thinking for when school comes i could get like a light light brown cause my hair is darkish brown so it wont be any trouble with the school.(i hope) i keep on trying to convince my mom but she wont nudge she told me that i can get them if i get straight A’s (ya rite) but anyways if anyone agrees with me ill show my mom and hopefully she will change her mind.
Well, I am a 14 year old girl, and I have been asking my mom for highlights since I was about 11. She said that on my 15th birthday, I could get highlights. I have seen highlights on younger kids, and it doesn’t look good- they are too young. I think 13-14 is a good age. And I do agree with others- make them earn it. I think I have earned my highlights, since my GPA is a 4.0 . It is wrong to not let them have it at all, because then at 18 in college they will do some crazy color and you will be the one blamed.
I’m 13 and for my 13th Birthday I had my Hair Highlighted, I have Light brown hair With caramel and Normal Blonde Highlights In it does Look really Nice, also my hair is all diffrent Lengths.
To be fair Kids should have the right to say what they want because it’s there Hair at the end of the day and it’ll be there Mistake but it’s also there Parents Choice because no Parent wants to go out seeing there Child Lookign like a Complete fool with Hair that does not look right, you want your kids looking Nice, what I suggest is to Get some of them Hair Mascaras and try them out before getting it done for real.
there is somethin gi do want to know though , would Light Pink and Light Blue look good together about Half way down your hair on both sides at the front of your hair?
My 11 year old child wants hi lights, but i told her no because when i went to a salon i asked if an 11 year old child would be able to get hi lights and she said “no.” so, she started to call around different salons, and asked if it damaged her hair, most people said no and one person said it depend on which color.
But does it damage her hair?
hi im actualy 12 i started putting in high lights in in grade 3 i used the colaur to exporess my self its better hair that piercings and tattos right or getting in with the wrong groups well i started out with blond went to pink yes theres a moral then brown then darker brown then a light light blond ( im blond nautraly so lik bleach blond) then dark brown then black then i dyed my hair browm then i dyed it a strawberrie blond with blue streaks then now its red
moral is i had to dye my hair brown because my aunt tryed to streak my hair bleach bleach blond it ended up looking like i had justsploted the bleach every wher etake your kids to a profsinal honestly