Don’t try to be perfect – it can only backfire

I know what it’s like. When you’re pregnant for the first time, women often alternate from sheer panic (what have I gotten myself into and how will I manage??) with the perfection-syndrome (I’m going to be so different/the exact same as my mother; it’s all a matter of being efficient).

I don’t think this image, or hope, for perfection can be ridiculed. After all, we all want the best for our children and often this means working hard to reach that pinnacle of perfection, no matter what. But – that isn’t going to happen. And, what does end up happening is the exact opposite most of the time, as the new mom learns that she can’t be perfect. Unfortunately, this is then compounded by a feeling of failure because she didn’t meet these impossible standards she had set for herself.

While there are some non-negotiable things about being a parent, there is also lots and lots of wiggle room and times when "good enough" is all that’s needed. I speak from experience because I live with many regrets of times when I feel I should have been perfect – but wasn’t.

So, if you have a tendency to try to be perfect, read this mantra and memorize it – and then learn to believe it: I am not perfect. I am not superwoman. But, I am doing my best.

Oh – and while I’m at it, here’s another phrase you should memorize and use, especially when your baby is very young: Yes, thank you for offering to help!

Image: Newscom

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Tags: pregnancy blog, perfect mother