Entry #2: Breaking the Mirror “For Keeps” Contest
May 10, 2008 by angelique
Filed under Women's Health
“Where is Victory?”
by abigail
To have and know peace
is to have had and known war.
A time before the hatred crept in
I resided as a beautiful human being.
Now i am a woman before all else.
i am frantic–what do women do?
My inner instincts aren’t to be trusted
And i begin to to fill others expectations.
I wasn’t so engaged at first-
i would casually complain WITH girlfriends
about my weight, my hunger, my ugly worthless.
And as i grew more believing, my self hatred grew.
The common bond now became a series of secret ritual
–weigh, exercise, binge, purge, starve–die a little more.
My world grew smaller and i became more worthless–
others begged to know my “secret” to perfection.
i have no self– i am a slave to my inner General.
It is a shameful experience
to wage a secret war, where peace is always a pound away…
….i am one pound away from death…
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What is this all about? Click here to find out more about this nifty contest!
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Image: Newscom
oh gosh! I wish I could leave MORE than one comment to give you more votes.
From the first two lines…I just had to stop and read it over again and think about it…and realize just how true it rings to me. And then…the very end. The secret war…well since I’ve known it, maybe it just means I’ll one day know peace.
“i am frantic” – yes, yes, yes.