Family of gay boy slain in California blames school district
The family of a gay teenager who was fatally shot in class blames the school district for allowing their son to wear makeup and feminine clothing to school – factors the family claims led to the death.
The parents said faculty members knew their son had “unique vulnerabilities” and was subject to abuse because of his sexual orientation.
King was a ward of the court and living at a shelter for abused, neglected and emotionally troubled children at the time of the shooting. More >>>
I have to say I don’t blame the parents. Schools and teachers should know better than anyone, just how cruel kids can be. Especially at the eighth-grade level.
While I do understand the importance of being entitled to some rights of expression. I do believe there’s a time and place for this type of expression, regardless of how strange or out of the ordinary it may be – and school is just not the place.
I can’t begin to fathom what it would be like to have one of my sons come to be to disclose something so far beyond comprehension to me. I admire the parents who have strength to endure such a revelation with love and promise. I’m not sure I could or would, to be perfectly honest.
It’s easy to sit in the comfort of my mostly normal home and say what I would and would not do, but the reality is, I’m not sure what I would do. I find it difficult to believe I would ever be accepting of such behavior and believe I would tell my child that once they become 18 and are able to leave my home, they could be anything they wanted to be and dress any way they wanted to dress. However, as long as they live under my roof, they will conform to my rules which are designed to protect them – even from public torment and ridicule. That means doing anything that would make them stand out as abnormal in the surrounding community.
Gayla usually I’m right with you on things… I’m what some would call a “strict” parent and have pretty conservative views on a lot of things. But I don’t agree with this at all.
Parents are blaming the school district for allowing their child to wear makeup and female clothing!? Schools can’t seem to do anything right anymore. We’re living in a world where schools in some countries are getting complaints because they don’t have transsexual bathrooms for pre-op students. You KNOW that if parents encouraged their son’s expression, by letting him dress in that manner, and the school DIDN’T let him dress that way, they would be throwing a freakin’ hissy fit. So what do we want?
People bitch because the school lets kids do certain things, and then people bitch when the school WON’T let kids do things. So what the hell are the schools supposed to do? Had this school set a policy that kept students from dressing in this manner, you know some parent would have jumped all over it, the ACLU would have gotten involved and it would have been a huge mess.
Whatever happened to parents being involved in their kids’ lives, instead of blaming schools?! This boy was a ward of the state – which shows that his parents did something (or maybe did nothing) that put him there. He was living in a shelter, for abused, neglected and trouble children. I don’t know the story behind why the child was there, but I find it awfully interesting that NOW the parents are super concerned about their son, instead of when he was alive and in their care. I smell a scam.
I don’t think the school district should be to blame for this kid’s death because they allowed him to dress that way. If anything, they failed to protect him from bullying and stopping his killer. I think people should try and be more tolerant. I gave up trying to conform because I know that kids will find anything to be mean about. I just don’t like hearing people thinking that bullying victims wouldn’t be bullied if they were more “normal”.
Gayla, typically I love you but today you sound like an ass.
Allowing a child to wear makeup doesn’t cause his death, encouraging everyone to fit into a “normal” mold allows for hate crimes like this. It’s a terrible tragedy, but blaming the victim is perhaps most hideous of all.
@ Brooke – I couldn’t agree more that parents should be more involved in protecting their kids – however, in this case, the child was taken away from his parents and placed in care that allowed him to be “different.” I believe in those cases, that everyone involved “in the system” should take up a sort of responsibility to see that a child is safe.
I believe the primary purpose of schools is to provide an education – not a venue that allows children to express their individuality. There are dress codes that are in place and rather than looking the other way and whispering when a child comes in expressing them self in such a flamboyant way, they should intervene and insist the child conform to dress codes.
Stricter dress codes, up and to uniforms would surely eliminate a great deal of stress that so many kids go through – whether it be because there’s no room for branding anymore – or it be to prevent situations such as this from happening.
No one ever said that school should be anything but a forum for education – but with the ACLU and all the “freedom” that is being awarded to young kids – it’s become more of a circus or sideshow with a little learning tossed in.
Furthermore, kids no longer fear leadership – and that in itself is a greater and growing problem.
@ Anonymous Teen – Again, school is a forum for education ONLY. I believe there should be a set and very strict dress code that should be followed as to avoid much of the harassments that go one with kids these days.
I’m sure things haven’t changed much since I was a teen and the majority of harassments and teasing occur because of what a person wears or their efforts to express their “individuality” – that brings me to my next question — At what age do you think a person TRULY becomes who they are?
If you say in their teens – you couldn’t be further from the truth.
I don’t think you will find a single adult who will say they are exactly like they were at 13 – 17 at all.
@ Jessica – Allowing a child to wear makeup doesn’t cause death – but it certainly thrusts them into a very negative and emotionally scarring situation. Teens don’t have the ability to recognize the dangers of such expressions and I believe it’s the adults in charge that should step in with intervention to prevent such damaging decisions.
I think allowing kids to express their individuality and expecting schools to babysit them while they do is wrong. I think enough pressure is being placed on our schools as it is and it’s causing a decline in valuable teachers.
Schools should be allowed to have VERY strict rules and follow them so they can cut the bullshit and get to education – leave the individuality aspects to the parents and caregivers.
A solid vote for UNIFORMS