Halloween, Without the Costume
November 1, 2008 by Kristina Chew, PhD
Filed under Health
Try as we might, we couldn’t figure out a Halloween costume for Charlie. I found the captain’s hat that was part of last year’s costume (he was, yes, a captain) and Charlie took it off as soon as I placed it on his head. He’s never been too interested in dressing up for Halloween and has usually needed a big of coaxing to trick or treat: Charlie’s wary of walking up strange new walkways; once, a small dog appeared and started barking really loudly just as the door was slowly being opened. Charlie turned and raced back down the walkway and no promise of candy would draw him back, and he’s remained wary about walking into houses he’s never been into (not a bad thing, in and of itself).
Charlie’s class had a little Halloween party with cupcakes and (for those who wanted to dress up) costumes. And instead of going through the whole trick or treat thing, Charlie and I found ourselves heading to Jersey City in the late afternoon, with the plan of parking the car at my office, walking to the getting a new Leapster, Charlie’s been wanting to carry both it and his old one around. They’re a bit awkward to hold and just as I was going to offer to carry them in my bag, Charlie somehow managed to shove both Leapsters into the front pocket of is blue hooded sweatshirt. We proceeded down Kennedy Boulevard, which is a major thoroughfare in Jersey City. Both sides are lined with brick apartment buildings, again woodframe houses, storefronts, and there’s always a steady stream of fast moving traffic. As you get closer to Journal Square, i’s all storefrontss—Goodwill, dollar store, a restaurant adversing a very cheap breakfast as noted by a hand-written sign, a Payless shoe store—-and a Methodist church in front of which people hang out around at all times of the day, a shopping cart packed with plastic bags nearby.
Charlie likes to alternate racing ahead of me with shuffling beside me. Despite the roar of the traffic, he’s very good about following requests to stop, wait, wait up. Usually there’s not a lot of people out walking in the evening but Friday night, the closer we got to Journal Square, the more groups there were of children clad as superheroes, Sponge Bob, princesses, witches, with their mothers pushing younger siblings in strollers and speaking in Spanish or Arabic. Everyone had plastic pumpkins to hold the candy. They weren’t so much ringing doorbells as walking into stores, which apparently, besides selling mattresses or women’s clothing or sneakers, were carrying on an Amrerican childhood tradition.
Charlie and I moved among the trick or treaters. Many of the children’s costumes were completely obscured under winter coats and there were a few crying children, reaching for their plastic pumpkins and “just one more” piece of candy. We crossed Kennedy Boulevard and took the PATH into Manhattan, and then the B train up to where Jim’s office is. We got some take-out of Charlie’s favorites and brought it to Jim’s office where Charlie got to dine on Dad’s desk. Going home, we saw a far greater variety of costumes than one generally sees in a New Jersey suburb. There was a gorilla football player, a mug of beer (complete with foam), a team of Ghostbusters. a couple of accident scene victims……
Charlie kept his hood pulled tight over his ears and those two Leapsters in his front pocket, in his usual way; I’m almost starting to think that blue hooded sweatshirt if a bit of a uniform, comforting in its sameness. Who needs a costume when you know you’re guaranteed the good treat of a night out in good company?
Sounds like a good night for Charlie, who needs the trick or treat stuff anyway I’m starting to think! I took our son over to a friends who has 3 sons, just to give him a chance to be a little social, and two of them with blow-up costumes on had nothing but trouble with the costumes. My friend and her husbanc carried batteries and screwdriver along just in case (too much work I say), there was a lot of tension and grousing, Casey had to wait to go up because these costumes took too much room on the porches, ruining the rhythm. And by the time we had hit about 8 houses, he was done. I guess what I’m getting at is that your approach was a good one, don’t force things like I did. To what end really? DId he have fun, or was I having fun watching him do the “typical” thing? Well, not last night!!!!!! He doesn’t even like chocolate candy, which he has a lot of now!
Happy 1st of November!
Patrick really likes to dress up (he was darth vader this year) but the trick or treating is a bit of a strain on him. He does about 10 houses which honestly is still way too much candy. We spent most of the evening hanging out with friends and watching cartoons.
We skipped the costume this year. I kept asking my son if he wanted to wear one but he flatly refused. Last year, I got him the least costume-like costume I could find – a sweatsuit with a skeleton pattern on it – and he HATED the thing. Getting him to wear it was not a pleasant experience for anyone. So last night we went sans costume to two houses, one of a friend and then her mom’s house 2 blocks away. That was it, and it was enough.
Every year we test the Halloween waters. Some years Eleanor has not been down with the whole gufuffle–too loud, too confusing or fuggedit about the costume. This year she swanned it a bit in her sorceress costume and took a lot of interest in the proceedings of decorating the porch and practicing “trick or treat”. When we asked, she said yes…so, okay. If it had gone the other direction, well, okay as well.
he’s remained wary about walking into houses he’s never been into
Does sound pretty reasonable.
We had the reverse experience last night–At the first door Eleanor trick-or-treated at (our next door neighbor’s, with whom we are cordial, but not close)–when the door opened, she walked right in, which was not quite what we had been rehearsing. However the neighbors were more than a little *festive*, have children of their own, and did not seem the least bit nonplussed (“Come in! Come in!”). As there was a party going on already we all ended up having punch and cookies and watching one of the grandpas doing magic tricks.
The next few houses she got the rhythm down quickly, but had a quizzically amused expression, that really looked like, “Free candy? Are you completely sure this is legal?” (to paraphrase Charlie Brown’s sister). I went home to hand out our candy but she and dad were out for quite a while. They came home chilled but cheerful.
It was a pretty good evening, all in all.
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Happy day after Halloween
I think the way you all celebrated Halloween is great! I have found as each year passes, that what I knew of Halloween as a child.. the whole trick or treat thing.. is disappearing. There just aren’t as many children now and alternatives like parties, fairs, and going to the mall seem to be taking over.
Our family skipped trick or treating in 2006 and 2007. We had a baby in the family and it was just too difficult to get out and about. One of those years “Halloween” was walking out the back door, going to the front door, ringing the bell and saying trick or treat!
This year we returned to a tradition we had done for 3 or 4 years prior to 2006, going to a friend’s house in “town,” gathering with friends and all going out. All things considered, it worked out quite well for our family this year. I haven’t posted about it yet, but will in the next day or two.
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