Have chronic pain? You can still have sex.

Living with chronic pain can easily put a damper on your sex life. After all, who wants to make love if they’re hurting? On the other side, the partners may be reluctant to be intimate with someone they know is hurting. But – it doesn’t have to be that way.

Have sex, making love, making out, whatever you want to call it – is a healthy normal part of life. We can’t let pain deny us from the pleasures in life; we just may have to make a few accommodations for that ever-present discomfort.

Talk to your partner. It’s amazing how many people assume that their partner knows how they feel. Talk to him or her about your pain but how you still want to have intimacy.

Discuss different ways to be intimate. Sex doesn’t have to mean intercourse. Sex can mean pleasuring each other in different ways that may not be as demanding on a body that is having pain.

Experiment with positions. Need cushions or pillows? Make it fun or sensuous by having special cushions or routines to get in the mood. If your usual sexual positions are painful, try something else.

Make appointments and prepare for your private time. If you plan ahead of time for your sexual encounters, you may be able to avoid doing things beforehand that could bring on pain or make it worse. You could do things that would decrease your pain levels or you could take pain medication to ward off any pain that you know will come with sexual activity.

Don’t give up. Even people who don’t have chronic pain may set out to have a sexual evening and end up having something turn off the mood. If you want a healthy sex life, you may need to work at it a bit more, but if it’s what you want, it should be well worth the effort.

Image: iStock

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