How do you learn how to raise a child?

Parenting isn’t easy, is it? No matter how cute and cuddly our children are, each one also has his own way of throwing a tantrum or breaking a curfew. They shower us with surprise hugs and kisses one breakfast morning, then storm out of the room when they don’t get their way. How does one learn his way around parenting? There isn’t a clear-cut way, is there? That’s the beauty of it.

Image credit: Toni Tiu

1. There are a lot of books on how to raise a child, and the right book for each one of us can illuminate a lot of things. One can learn various theories and examples from books. It is up to us which ones we are comfortable applying to our own parenting styles.
2. There’s learning from our own parents. Would we like to raise our children with the same values we grew up with? What are the things we would like to replicate (or avoid replicating) when we parent?
3. There’s learning from other parents. They can be our friends. Or they could be fellow parents who have children almost the same age as our own children. For example, fellow new mothers adjusting to the situation of a newborn, parents with teenagers getting support from other parents with teens. A trustworthy group can make for a solid support system.
4. There’s learning from experience. We’re not perfect. Parenting is trial-and-error. Standing in the corner not helping little Bobby behave? Let’s see if taking his video games away from him will work. Teenage Patty locking herself up in her room? Maybe a date with Dad at the arcade can help relax her and open up. If the technique fails, we think of other ways to fix the situation.

Parenting is an everyday challenge. Learning how to raise a child can be a tedious process, but a highly rewarding one. We learn something new everyday. Hopefully, the lessons we learn not only transform us into the parents we want to become, but help inspire our children to be the best they can too.