Is Cheating Subjective?
August 31, 2007 by Sasha Manuel
Filed under Relationships
One of the many discussions I’ve had with the boyfriend is the subject of cheating.
What constitutes cheating? What can be classified as cheating? Is cheating subjective or do we follow an unspoken rule? Do rules on cheating differ when two people are just dating than when these two are in a relationship?
Dodgy as it may sound, there are individuals who believe that cheating IS subjective. There’s always that context of “it depends” and the sad part about all of it is that these people don’t even realise that they are indeed being subjective.
For example, it has been raised that by mere “checking out” the opposite sex — accompanied by attraction, of course — even without action can constitute as cheating for some. Note, the principle behind “thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s wife” applies in this situation. As for others, upon hearing this example, they would react in a way that shows their disapproval or disdain over them people who believes in such.
Isn’t that a case of something being subjective?
Hence, I write this now in order to get to the bottom of things, hoping to find answers to the questions I’ve posted above. I’d like to know what YOU would consider as cheating. Not too much to ask now, is it? I’d really appreciate your thoughts on this subject.
What constitutes a cheating act can be very subjective, but to us the definition of cheating is simple.
It’s a breaking of trust.
If one partner does anything that breaks the agreed upon boundaries of the relationship, that’s cheating. Notice I said ‘agreed upon’ boundaries, that means that you actually have to talk about it with your partner!
We break from societal norms on this one…
We believe that kissing or even having sex with someone other than your partner is not cheating if you both agree to it.
Love is a beautiful feeling between 2 people. Cheating does not exist in between true love.Cheating is subjective if you hurt somebody. Trust,Love and understanding are main points helps in a beautiful relationship
Hmm…difficult one! To respond to Dan-Jennifer’s comment above, I am sure there are ‘unwritten boundaries’ too that can constitute cheating. Over the course of your relationship you figure out what will constitute cheating to your partner and what won’t.
It’s those ‘unwritten boundaries’ and ‘unspoken expectations’ that get us all in trouble. How is another person supposed to live up to these things?