Little Girl, Grown Woman

For the past few weeks, I’ve been re-thinking certain theories I’ve come up with in the entire duration of my dating life. I admit that it’s only been a decade since I started to seriously think about dating and relationships. Realising that it has been actually 10 years or so that I’ve been in the whole dating scene has made me come up to one conclusion. I’ve been holding onto little girl notions of what love is all about.

“I still often see myself as the same little girl who followed her dad around like it’s the only and most important thing in the world and nothing else mattered.” — Sasha Manuel, SashaManuel.com

When I wrote that in the about page of my new photo journal, I didn’t realise it sums up how I’ve viewed and acted in relationships. Weird, huh? But it does feel good to let it out. This sort of certainty. I mean, losing my dad has left me with fears or perhaps the hidden fears finally resurfaced and it felt like life has thrown me a curve ball. Something that I wasn’t prepared for. Then again, it’s also unexpected that I find some sort of sense in the event.

Knowing that I’m already a grown woman but very much still like a little girl. I still treasure those moments. Accepting that I’m capable of feeling that way towards a man that I love. I’m built that way for a reason and all I need is a balance. I can still be someone with little girl notions but now with grown woman strength.

What about you ladies? What’s the earliest memories of yourself can you associate yourselves with in how you go about relationships? Do you still see yourself as that same little girl even when the reflection your seeing in the mirror is of a grown woman?