Monkey see, monkey do
February 19, 2008 by angelique
Filed under Women's Health
Kids are great mimics, aren’t they? My son has the ability to imitate people’s voices, almost perfectly matching their cadences and intonations.
Unfortunately, youngsters don’t just mimic benign stuff like speech patterns; they also play a game of “monkey see, monkey do” by imitating whatever happens around them.
Including the way mommy eats (or doesn’t eat).
And the way daddy calls women “fat” and makes fun of strangers because of their weight.
And how everyone’s always “dieting” so they don’t get “big” and “ugly”.
What’s a kid to do when he or she is surrounded by appearance-related pressure?
Hmm… let’s see… what would you do?
Please, if you’re part of one of these cycles, I beg you to get off this destructive carousel. Not only is it dangerous for the soul, it can be deadly for the body.
A great, much-needed reminder of how we pass down these destructive, negative ways of thinking and viewing the world to youngsters, and why we must stop, Angelique.
I agree! We need to help our children by learning to accept ourselves and others and stop judging people by how they look and start looking at what they offer, how they love and all else that sits right inside of each and every one of us!
I grew up in one of these environments. My mother was convinced she was fat, and she would constantly weigh herself. There was one weight that she freaked out about, and she’d keep telling me that she was almost at it and it was too fat and awful and she had to diet.
Now I’m terrified of that weight. That weight, to me, means obesity. It’s just really tough because it’s NOT a bad weight – it’s a weight that most women reach when they get to their mid-twenties and now, because of my mother, I’m terrified of hitting it.
I don’t think she knew what she was doing, and I forgive her, but it’s a harsh reminder for me to do the right thing by my future children, and bring them up in a body-positive environment.
Alicia & Kendra:
It’s so tough, isn’t it, though? We all carry some emotional baggage, and I often find myself swallowing words. In fact, I stopped myself short because I almost told my son tonight that I was “bad” for eating a few pieces of candy.
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Katie:
I don’t think your mother was bad to do what she did, either. I’m sure she wouldn’t have said what she did if she knew it would make you fearful of a number on the scale.
Please know that I and others completely understand your fears. I dreaded hitting 100 pounds for many years when I was anorexic. And now that I’m finally over that mark, life is much easier and I realize that it’s just a few digits, nothing more, nothing less.