Polygamy, Not Mormons
October 26, 2007 by Tracee Sioux
Filed under Parenting
Did you all see the Oprah with the polygamist families? Some of you might already know that I grew up Mormon.
Polygamists are not Mormons.
Mormons used to allow polygamy, but they stopped it in the 1800s when Utah became a state. (Actually, the U.S. was pissed off that they let all those wives vote and women didn’t actually have that right yet – little feminist history I betcha didn’t know.)
The thing about associating Mormons with polygamists is that it makes you see them as oddities or extremists. Now I would point out that while my ancestors may have had more than one wife – Protestant ancestors actually burned women at the stake for being witches. Catholic ancestors beheaded wives rather than divorce them and risk hell – follow that logic. Religion, all of it, has it’s historical dirty laundry. Aren’t there some Jewish husbands refusing their wives a divorce under some ancient law as we speak?
Mitt Romney, Republican Presidential Candidate, is not a polygamist. He’s just not. What kind of magic would he have to have to live in the public eye as a politician and be hiding an entire family? Hiding entire families only works if you’re not in the public eye.
Which brings us to the difference between the Colorado City, Ariz. polygamists and the apparently very wealthy, trendy and attractive kind in Centennial Park, Ariz.?
Isolation and Paranoia.
Oh, and apparently credit. Seems the Centennial Park kind has more credit or better jobs or something.
What’s it going to cost the rest of us if they decriminalize poligamy? Nothing. It’s not going to cost us anything to allow gay marriage either. There are lots of alternative lifestyles, leave them alone.
Did you notice the accent? The cadence of their language ? The peculiar use of words like “consequences” and “principles” and “blessings.” That’s the language of my youth, it made me a little home-sick.
I’m excited that my parents and siblings and neices are visiting next week.
All Mormon – all mono-marriage. Singular. One. Uno. Only.
Sometimes I wish for a wife. Someone other than me to do the cooking and cleaning and all the other housey-wifey chores I’m not particularly fond of. Not another wife for my husband – one for me. I totally deserve a wife.
What’s the dirty little secret of your religious history?
That is the biggest thing that bugs me when you tell someone you’re mormon. I have no idea why that stereotype has never died.
Religion is a pretty embarrassing topic, which is why I am glad it has no part in a political discussion.
And, while you’re right, gay marriage costs nothing, legal polygamy costs bags and bags.
If an American Muslim soldier, serving in Iraq because his Arabic language skills are so desperately needed, for example, had four legal wives and between 4 and 8 children, which wife would get the survivor’s pension? Which woman would get that extra bit of secrutiy? Would it be divided among the four wives so that all of them were equally insecure while raising their children?
I think most of the wives work.
While I said decriminalize – I didn’t say legalize. Which simply means, maybe we should just let them live thier life and stop and not throw them in jail unless there is actual crime committed.
I don’t think the scenario is any different then say a serial monogomist – say if this American Muslim soldier were to go from port to port living with and knocking up different girlfriends. Those women are just going to split the pension for thier children.
I don’t think it’s useful to criminalize people’s relationships. Its a crime for this guy to say he’s “married” to these women. But, it’s not a crime for him to say they are his “mistrisses.” It’s not a crime for men to go around impregnanting all sorts of different women – look at Hugh Hephner how many children does he have from different wives and girlfriends?
Criminalizing isn’t stopping him from doing it. It’s not producing fewer dependents.
And it is thier religious belief. I think there is a constitutional right to “freedom of religion.”
That Jeffs guy was actually hurting people. The Cenntenial Park polygamists seemed pretty harmless. Putting that husband in jail is bound to cost us more than leaving him alone and letting him provide for his family.
Cozmo,
Well, it is juicy. It’s a strange and outrageous thing to have in your history. Interesting if nothing else.
Next time just ask them if they still burn witches, behead wives refuse to allow their wives a divorce? Everyone has dirty laundry – not just the Mormons.
Mainstream Mormons don’t do polygamy, and if they did they would be excommunicated. They’re highly normal, y’all.
Didn’t see Oprah, but I don’t have a problem with any consenting adults participating in polygamy. Go at it Hef.
BUT, I do have a problem with Jeffs and other polygamous groups forcing 12-14 year old girls to marry and have children.
Wrote about this a while back at:
http://www.queenofviolets.com/2007/09/i-hope-that-all-flds-girls-and-young.html
I will say that secrecy and criminalization have only isolated these groups and ironically their victims more.