Response Time
May 24, 2006 by gayla
Filed under Relationships
A close friend of mine who is active in the online dating scene asked me about response time – pertaining to emails of course, but that got me to thinking about other aspects of dating as well.
A few questions come to mind -
When responding to emails, how long is too long and considered rude when responding? Consider both those you are interested in and those you are not.
Follow-up phone calls! If you go on a first date, how long after the date should you wait to call?
Is there any harm in the woman calling the man first?
I’m interested in seeing if society has changed over the years and just how response times have or have not adjusted with those changing times.
Ach – I hate this subject. Why? Because in my book, if you like someone, or if you had a really good first date with them – why shouldn’t you just bloody call them!? None of this “wait three days” or “I’m a woman I can’t call” or “he called the next day, he’s too desperate” – I hate games like that. At the end of the day, if it’s going to develop into an enduring relationship that stands up over time, all the messing around at the beginning is such a waste of time.
I hate games but I also believe in propriety. What if I was brought up to believe that men should be the initiators? I don’t know. I’m not an extremist but there are exceptional situations. I guess my point is if I don’t call, it doesn’t mean I’m ‘playing a game’
I feel this way about most emails…rather dating or not….if you can reply immediately then good. If not, then a couple of days is fine, but a week or longer is not cool. As for calls the next day is good, especailly if you had a good time and it was a good date…I agree with the others about the “I’m man and must wait three days.” That is crock. I like things to be kinda prompt so the sooner the better or a think someone has lost interest…that means a day or so. I did have a guy call me two to three hours after a date once and we never talked after that. Sorry but that was way too soon, therefore, the calling the next day doesn’t seem desparate to me but calling a few hours after the date and the same night or day as the date then ok that is pushing it.