Should Kids have Summer Curfews?
May 23, 2009 by Eliza Ferree
Filed under Family, Parenting
Tonight my oldest and I waited inside the car while daddy and the girls shopped. We just sat there, with the windows rolled down and chatted about the upcoming summer break. Of course we did hit a topic that I think all parents and children have a lot of opinion on.
IMG: Sxc.hu
First, while sitting in the car (at Wal-Mart) we saw a teen on a bike almost get hit. But amazingly he jumped the car and landed safely and away he went, there were a bunch out there in the far parking lot just hanging out in their revved up vehicles and riding bikes (bicycles by the way). That is until the police showed up and stayed there for a bit. My guess is he was telling them they had to scatter or about the curfew.
The CURFEW is what spiked our conversation, he believes kids should have no curfew. I, of course couldn’t disagree more. He understands why there is one during the school year but not summer. He thinks “adults” take away too many rights or make too many rules. ie, can’t skateboard in public areas, must wear a bike helmet, curfews, can’t loiter, etc. He says summer is for fun, it’s the one time they don’t have a ton of teachers telling them what to do.
Of course I disagreed explaining why their are rules, etc. But what’s your take on it? Do you believe in having a curfew, if so what is it?
Abso-friggin-lutely!
My teen has a curfew during the school year – 8 pm. During the summer and sometimes for special occasions during the school year, it’s 9:30.
Why?
Because that’s when it gets dark. During the summer, anyway. And that’s my “excuse” for her – because it’s going to be dark or almost dark by then. If she’s with a family member like an aunt or grandma, I let that person use their discretion.
Now, when she starts driving next year, I will give her an extra half an hour depending on what’s going on.
Of course, there are always stipulations – who she’s with, who’s driving, where they’re going, etc. And sometimes the curfew changes depending on those factors. Also, things like grades, following the rules, not skipping class and things of that nature play a part as well.
I may consider extending the curfew as she gets older but we’ll just have to see what happens.
Yes, she’s gotten mad at me about this in the past. Last fall, she even started sneaking out. As always, though, we caught her and put an end to it real quick.
In my experience, she’s happier, friendlier and much better all around when the boundaries are set and followed. The few times I’ve relaxed things, she’s gotten herself in trouble and paid for it.
I hope that helps. Looking forward to reading others’ opinions too.
~Annie
I forgot to mention one other thing -
Our town actually has a curfew for anyone under 18 as well and if a cop wanted to, he/she could cite the minor as well as their parent and could require them to appear in court. I believe the city-wide curfew is 11 pm and my teenager is well aware of this.
It’s worth checking out if your area has a similar curfew for minors and using it as your excuse is another way to enforce your own family rules.
~Annie
i think it depends on the parents.
my daughter is 14 years old, and her curfew is 10:30pm on weekends.
why you ask?
because i trust her. she has never once been late(okay, 5 mins at the most), and is a very responsible girl. she has fantastic grades and can make her own decisions.
if while out, she decideds to do something stupid, she will get whatever is coming towards her. we can not keep sheltering our kids from the “dangers” of this world. they are out there, yes. and its our job to show kids how to be smart and stay away from those dangers.
its all about trust. it really is.
and no i am not a bad parent, i have done a great job raising my oldest son, who is a junior in college.