Should Teachers Be Banned From Having Babies?
Livid is too mild a word to express my current feelings towards my son’s kindergarten situation. Kindergarten should be a memorably pleasant year. A child’s kindergarten teacher is so vital to their over all impression of school and learning. My son’s teacher was an exemplary kindergarten teacher. There was only one downfall. She was pregnant. I am not one who looks down upon career women having babies, but if it means that their maternity leave wreaks havoc on my child’s kindergarten experience, I am totally against it. My son has had three different teachers this year, two of them substitutes. He has gone from loving school to despising it. He has been crying for a month now and having chronic stomach aches. His desire to academically excel, has shockingly diminished. This is not the first time that this exact situation has happened, either. My older son went through the same thing last year, with his kindergarten experience. It was so bad, that we had to send him to Sylvan Learning to get caught up in his studies.
PBS online contains a median age chartof teachers from the year 1971 to 1998. The median age of teachers has decreased by more than 20 years! It seems that the new generation of teachers has a high percentage of young women who are in the process of starting their families, as well. Today’s teachers are starting very young and trying to balance the “having it all” dream. I am here to say that sometimes, trying to have it all, ends up hurting innocent people. I was reading an old article in The New York Times that spoke of barring teachers who had small babies in the home because of the neglect that their duties suffered. The article was dated November 30, 1911. Despite the old fashioned views about women in the workplace, in general, it proved a good point. Even way back then, they knew that when a woman attempts to balance her role as a new mother and professional life, could likely result in overload and negligence.
Many may disagree with my views on this. That is okay. I cannot possibly expect dissenters to understand my point of view, as you are not here every morning to see my little boy tear up as he exits the car. You do not know the suffering it causes to watch a boy who once adored his class, dread the very thought of being there. I see it daily, just as I did last year. I am the one who paid thousands of dollars to a private tutoring institution, to make up for the lack of consistent teaching my first grader received last year. So if you care to leave dissenting comments, go right ahead. Just know that the suffering of my kindergartner is not just a statistic, it is real and it is very unnecessary.
It seems to me (though I only know part of what is probably a long story) that the problem really isn’t that his teacher had a baby and is out, but that the substitutes the school is providing are not adequate. The school knew the other teacher would be having a baby, and they should have planned for A SINGLE long term substitute to serve in that classroom, especially because that classroom has young children who probably crave routine and balk at change. Furthermore, it seems from your post that the subs that are provided are not teaching or keeping up with the lesson plans. Again, I think that is not the fault of his regular teacher, but the subs and the school for not meeting the goals/outcomes of the program. JMO.
Maybe we should start trying to get some men back into the teaching profession
Seriously, the schools need to have better plans for having long term subs to take over the class for these situations. I remember a couple times when I was a kid having a new teacher take over for several months when someone went out on maternity leave and that teacher always took over just like she belonged there.
The problem is partly the lack of planning to find an adequate sub. The first sub they found had to leave because of her husband being an on call nurse.
The regular teacher waited too long to find a sub. But the pool of potential subs seems to be a less than adequate one. Last years long term sub had never taught before and was not even finished with school yet.
My point being, this would all be avoided if pregnant teachers would consider their obligation to their students and realize how life changing having a baby really is. I’ve seen way too many young teachers have babies and then realize how hard it is and decide not to return. They have very unrealistic expectations regarding motherhood, if you ask me.
You can’t ban people from working because they want a family. You can push for double teachers in school classrooms, you can homeschool, you can address it at a state and national level, but ban women for wanting a family. That’s horrible. If you’re honestly shelling out all that money for tutors, why not pay for a different school?
Schools have always consisted of substitutes, change, limited attention. If your child can’t handle it maybe it’s the environment that doesn’t suit the child, not the teachers. I homeschool, so I don’t have to deal with the schools. Although, I do support school change and pay increases for teachers because my son’s peers are in school. Still, nothing will make me believe it’s ok to ban women from the workplace for wanting children.
Honestly, if your child is crying each day, and you force him to go to school instead of finding another option, then it’s your fault, not the teacher’s – no one is forcing you to send kids to school.
Jennifer~ You have a legitimate point as far as pushing for double teachers. Unfortunately we have a shortage of them to begin with. I do not have the option of home schooling. I have seven very young children and it would be detrimental to their academic needs, worse than having a substitute. However, I wouldn’t homeschool even if I had one child. It is just a personal preference.
To ignore the issue of the teacher’s lack of proper planning and blame me for not being able to afford private school doesn’t seem very fair. We had to borrow money just to send my son to the private tutoring. We live pay check to pay check and cannot afford private school.
I do not think that we should really ban teahcers who want families. I just think that there needs to be a better system implemented for the sudden increase in the need for long term subs as a result of pregnancy.
I respect your opinions and thank you for contributing to the conversation.
This is one of those subjects that get my blood boiling too. Just the whole teachers lacking skills in general is bad enough.
At the same time, I don’t think teachers are making enough to put up with all the crapola they have to from spoiled brat kids either.
Just a bad situation all the way around
You raise an issue that I see in our school as well, not just at kindergarten, the primary grades as a whole tend to attract younger women. My son is now in Gr. 3, and his teacher is a seasoned veteran, so we’re lucky. We were lucky last year as well, while his teacher did get pregnant, she finished the school year, but gave birth around November as did another Gr. 2 teacher, so they were down two quality Gr. 2 teachers this year because of mat. leave. And in Canada, it’s a big thing because mat. leave is 1 year here; teachers have the option of extending it to 2 years and can remain with the board. The issue of continuity is particularly hard on the kindergarteners, though -friends of ours son went through about 4 subs his first year of school and it was terrible.
I’m keeping my fingers crossed that we get my son’s K-teacher for the little one this September. She’s a fantastic teacher, my age which is old, and what’s more, she’s got 3 boys now well into middle school and high school and she’s DONE!
I agree that it’s an issue of poor planning on the job of the administration; perhaps the pool of subs is also not very good.
I hope your little one adjusts soon, this is a bad situation when you’re trying to establish the merits of education at such an impressionable age.
I feel your frustration, but agree with the others; can’t force restrictions on women if they want a family; it’s the organization and support system around them that needs to help pick up the slack. And yes, I don’t think teachers are appreciated nor paid enough, given how important they are to society.
Great topic, and great blog!
Ok, I’m one of “those” teachers who has a career and had a family while having a career. I took my maternity leave while I kept my career. Teaching is the only profession that anyone would EVER question women taking maternity leave. Has anyone else ever noticed that? I’m also one of those teachers who spent several years putting my career ahead of my family for children who were not mine, and paid a price for it. Luckily I have learned from my mistakes. Why is it that you would expect a teacher to be the only profession not to have women have a career and not have a family? We are not paid NEARLY enough to be held to the standards that are expected of us from the state, our districts, and the parents. If you knew even half of what we actually do- aside from giving our very best to your children every day- I think you’d be more fogiving in your assessment that we might not deserve to have a loving family at home. As much as your blood boils at the thought that your child is unhappy at having a sub, my blood boils that his teacher is being judged for having a child. I love your posts, Kadi, but seriously. Teachers put up with a lot of crap, and this is one good example.
I’ve done some serious thinking on the topic at hand and I’ve taken all of your views into consideration and I’ve come to the conclusion that you’re all wrong!
Okay, I’m totally kidding. Sorry… It’s the jokster in me.
Anyway, I admit that in my angst for my children, I let my emotions bleed into my post. I did not look at the situation very objectively, as a good writer should. I failed you all in that aspect.
I must say that many of my family members are teachers. I see everything that they put into their classes. It goes far and above the call of duty. They do not get paid nearly what they are worth. Yet film and television stars, who only work to entertain the masses, get paid way too much money and are catered to constantly. It does make me sad to see the priorities of our country lean towards the entertainment industry while our teachers don’t even get enough paper to make all of the necessary homework copies.
Teachers do have every right to procreate. They are just as entitled to have a family and a career as any other woman. Teachers are not the only professional women who get a load of crap for trying to balance kids and career. It is universal. My beef with teachers and pregnancy, is the lack of planning that has gone into the post partum period. I’m not saying that this happens everywhere. But it has happened here waaaaaayyy too much. Too many children have suffered trauma over having their normalcy disrupted as the subs come and go. It isn’t right. It also isn’t right to expect women teachers to put their lives on hold for the sake of their job. All I’m asking for is a little more preparation and thought about how hard it must be on these little guys who miss their teachers and have the proverbial rug yanked out from under them.
Despite my harsh criticism, I really do respect the teaching profession and have so much more positive things to say about it, than I do negative. I just felt compelled to vent my discontent with my son’s current situation.
I thank you all for your contributions to this post!
I work at a school, which I love, but due in part to being with kids all day, every day, and for other reasons, I am pretty sure I don’t want kids of my own. This is actually true of other teachers I know too. I also have friends who teach who did everything in their power to plan for “July babies” so as not to disrupt the school year. Of course, this is not always possible.
The issue is with substitutes. I read someplace that on any given day, 10% of all teachers are absent from school, requiring a substitute. When several teachers are out in a school, it can get very difficult. Schools need to plan ahead for these situations, but good, reliable subs can be hard to come by.
Good luck in the future schooling of your children.
I am currently a pregnant preschool teacher. However, my child is not due until September so I will not be taking maternity leave. I am not planning on returning to work after the baby is born. I felt awful about having to take 4 weeks off from work due to pregnancy complications, but I need to look out for my own health first. I could not “plan” my pregnancy for a certain time because it took over a year for me to conceive. Yes, it is hard to have a substitute in the room for an extended period of time, but it cannot be helped. Teachers have every right to have children whenever they choose to do so.
Schools are babysitters and employment centres for working parents. If you want your children to enjoy and cultivate an experience of loving lifelong learning then homeschool them. If your response to this choice is negative then stop complaining about how the system is failing to meet your needs for certain qualities in a babysitter.
Wow! What an article! I was actually searching “raising teacher morale” when I stumbled across this article. This lady must have more time on her hands than she knows what to do with. I have a suggestion for you ma’am. Volunteer. Get in the classroom next time, and volunteer with the children while the teacher is on leave and when she returns. Did someone try and stop you from having children? No! Are you a teacher? Do you know all of the expections/high standards we are already held to without so much as a “thank you”? Quit complaining and get involved! Message boards do not constitute parent involvement.
Secondly, I would like to address the individual who was complaining of the teachers’ lack of skills. I would like a copy of your teaching certificate. If you don’t have one then please refrain from judging. You have NO clue the training that we have to go through AFTER we obtain our certification. The number one complaint of teachers across the nation is probably LACK OF PARENT INVOLVEMENT. Parents expect us to parent and teach their children. We would LOVE for parents to be accountable because that’s what is really wrong with education. Parents want to blame teachers because they are slackers. Sorry but it is the truth!
As a currently pregnant teacher I do understand your frustration. A teacher leaving for maternity leave is a disruption to not only your child, but to the faculty and staff at the school as well. That does not change the fact that teachers will procreate. As you have agreed it is our right as women. That does not mean that it makes it an easy decision for us. First off my husband and I have been trying for almost a year to conceive, and are delighted to have a little one of our own on the way finally!
But, my due date falls during state testing for my students…which I am responsible for. You have no idea the difficulty that this leaves me with. I feel that my students are my children. I care about them tremendously and do not want to disappoint them. However, I do not want to let down my own family either.
Good subs are not easy to come by unless you live near a college that is turning out teachers. Most of them are stay at home moms who have great intentions but do not have the background for teaching (yes, there are skills involved) and do not already have a rapport built with the students. Can you imagine coming into a room that already has routines established and the kids already love their old teacher? Not to mention you as the substitute also have a life outside of subbing? Subbing is not very often a career choice. It is something for most people to make a little extra cash on the side.
So, now I am left to deal with the ultimate decision. Do I quit in December (I want to be a stay at home mom) and hope that my school can find a good teacher to replace me at the midpoint…still allowing my students to forge a new relationship with a new teacher before the state testing? Or do I hope I make it all of the way into the 9th month without any problems and stick it out through the test and then leave them with who knows how many substitutes for the rest of the year? No choice is an easy one. I can’t imagine trying to pace my classroom on the state testing day all day long 9 months pregnant! And I don’t want to end up having to leave my precious students in hands of someone who does not have the same abilities as a certified teacher. There really is no easy way out. So, I ask you…what is a teacher to do? How do you suggest that we proceed with all of the things we want to do without disappointing anyone? It’s impossible. And I’m sorry, but if I have to choose between my happiness with my husband and the family we want to have together, and to trust that the school district will do everything in their power to ensure your child has a successful school year than that’s what I choose. There are no guarantees in life. Be happy for your child’s teacher, go up to school and volunteer in your child’s classroom, and join the PTO/PTA. The only way to make change is to support your local teachers by being there and involved. It may not be a perfect situation, but it can definitely be a better one if EVERYONE gets involved.
It is the administrators and school district’s responsibility to secure a quality substitute for a long term position, such as maternity leave. Unfortunately there is a shortage in quality full time teachers, let alone in quality substitute teachers. To assume that a woman must plan her family around the needs of the students in her class is ridiculous and during maternity leave (most of which is unpaid) this teacher must follow up to make sure daily lesson plans and teacher/student rapport is satisfactory, while adjusting to motherhood with an infant, is ludicrous. Get a grip lady! I agree with the other post…try volunteering in the classroom or homeschooling!
Why the heck is it someone else’s problem for your childs behavior? He will have many changes in life he’ll just have to get used too. And if your so darned concerened about who’s having a baby and how it affects your life, why don’t you take your childs education into your own hands and homeschool?
“Teaching is the only profession that anyone would EVER question women taking maternity leave.”
There are several – law, medicine, business, finance! I know of several professionals, outside of education, who terminated their pregnacies to keep their jobs! I don’t of any educator who has ever done so! In the business, legal and finance side, several women are terminated when they become mothers. Is it fair? No, but then again life is not fair!
As a teacher who is currently expecting her first child, and actually was in tears tonight stressing out about how it will affect my kids (high school) in April when I leave for the rest of the year, this article makes my blood boil.
MAYBE, just maybe, if more money was invested in education, if teachers were acutally paid what they were worth, and if schools could invest in paying for quality long-term subs, then this would not be a problem.
I was just informed by my department head that we are having trouble finding a replacement for me later this year. She is working to find a long-term sub with English background, but everyone she is interviewing is apparently refusing to grade student work. Which leaves me with two options:
1. I can juggle staying at home with my newborn, recovering from labor, and also grading essays and other subjective high school English daily assignments (for free I might add, since my maternity leave is unpaid)
or
2. I can leave assignments and lesson plans for my sub that have answer keys and are all completely un-subjective for my sub to grade, while completely disregarding all of the routines I have set up, and eliminatinating all of the higher level thinking types of assignments that I typically try to give my students (being that it’s an English class at the high school level).
As you can see, my options are slim, and I hate it. Hence, me bawling my eyes out tonight.
I get paid about $32,000 a year. I take home more work to grade, lessons to plan, etc. than you could probably imagine. Don’t get me wrong. I do love my job, and I adore my kids. It’s why I do what I do. Believe me.
However, there does come a point when demands become unreasonable, and what you just suggested – believe me. It goes so far beyond unreasonable, I cannot even fathom it.
Oh, and one last thing. There’s a REASON that the teaching profession is flooded with young teachers. It is because education is poorly funded, teachers are grossly underpaid, the work is difficult, exhausting, and emotionally draining, and while it is also extremely rewarding, sometimes the constant hoop jumping required just to try to do the job (as well as the lack of pay) makes many, many, many amazing and wonderful teachers leave the profession and seek something else where they are more respected, appreciated, and well paid.
Thus, you have a revolving door of eager, young, bright-eyed students, many of which end up leaving the profession within the first 3-5 years. Thus your “problem” of too many young teachers starting families (Imagine how selfish that is!!!!!!) and injuring your child.
I am a kindergarten teacher myself, and I am sorry to hear about your son’s kindergarten experience. I also believe kindergarten sets the tone for a child’s attitude about school, so of course it is vital that it be a positive experience. At the same time, I think the public is often unaware of the realities of a teacher’s profession.
Teachers must be very intelligent, responsible, morally minded individuals, just to hold a teaching job at a public school. My GPA requirements in college were higher than most other majors and if we got into trouble for underage drinking we were told that we could kiss our teaching career good bye.
Yes, many are young like myself, however, it is because we are paid a very meager salary for the amount of work that we do. Therefore, many talented teachers leave the profession because they are very capable of finding work where they are more respected, appreciated and well paid.
It makes me sad to even hear that some parents feel that teachers should not have children. It seems unfair considering all that they do for the welfare of our nation’s children. Often giving up most of their meager salary to buy learning materials to help their students meet ever challenging standards and test scores. Staying as late as six or seven in the evening. Taking time off work to visit a student whose single mother couldn’t get off work to be there for them in the emergency room.
I would not punish young, talented teachers for wanting to have children. After all, teacher’s care about children and know a lot about raising them. Chances are they will raise very successful, contributing members of society as well. What I would do, is allow teachers to take longer paid maternity leave like in Germany, or Sweden where women are allowed to take up to three years of maternity leave.
This would allow the school to recruit a more stable full time teacher. Substitutes are often young talented teachers, just out of college looking for their first classroom as well. I think the problem is that substitutes are more underpaid and often do not get the same benefits that regular teachers do. Therefore, these teachers are even less inclined to stay than full time ones.
Young teachers who have babies often think that because they love teaching so much they will be able to come back to work as soon as their nine weeks is over. However, because many of them end up in “baby world,” it is harder than they originally thought to send their child to baby day care.
I think the end result remains the same, and asking teachers to not have children is cruel and unreasonable. The result is once again, that the children suffer for a system failure.
The teacher’s baby suffers from baby day care, and the child in the teacher’s classroom suffers from not being able to attach to a stable guide in school. We need to change working conditions and show that we appreciate people who have direct contact with shaping our nation’s children. I think instead of denying rights to women and children, I think we should work towards giving ourselves more rights in this country. All women should have more maternity leave.