So How Did I Become a Stay at Home Dad?
Let me explain in further detail how I became a stay at home father. There were many aspects in my married life prior to having kids that indicated it was bound to happen, and the real question was more of when. When my wife and I first met she had most of her life figured out. She knew she was off to Veterinary School in Ohio and that she would spend her 4 years there and return home to go to work with her dad who owned his owned Veterinary Hospital. We also knew we wanted a lot of kids. I also knew I was not set up yet with a real good career job and was bouncing around working here and working there as we moved and traveled.
So if you put all those together it was almost inevitable, unless we wanted to put the kids in daycare. Not that my wife and I are completely against the idea, but we would rather have one person at home with the kids.
So for us there were 2 major determining factors in this:
1) My wife was making 5 times the amount of money I was. With her working there were tons of benefits from it, including the weekly paycheck.
2) We wanted our kids to have one parent raising the little ones during the day. Statistics show good results with at least one parent at home than throwing them in daycare for the day. Again, I am not opposed to daycare facilities. For some families both parents need to work and I am happy there are opportunities for the parents to use daycare facilities. But for us it doesn’t seem to be an option. Why?
Well, currently the daycare cost in my area is running anywhere between $350 and $500 per week per child. I have (or will have in January) 5 kids. Even if we chose the cheapest route we would have to fork out $1750 for the week. If I paid the higher prices I would be forking out $2500 for a week. I have 2 kids in Elementary School so I wouldn’t have to pay for 2 kids during the school year and only during school vacation and summers. So let’s get a rough estimate using the cheapest possible scenario.
3 children in daycare for 52 weeks at $350 per child would total $54,600 for the year. Let’s say I needed to dump my 2 older kids in daycare for 2 months in the summer and 2 weeks for vacation time like Christmas break, etc. So let’s go with 10 weeks for the year. So for 2 kids for 10 weeks at $350 per child would run us $7,000 for the year. That’s not too bad but let’s add that number to the $54,600 we originally came up with for the 3 kids and we would be forking out $61,600 for an entire year of daycare.
So basically if I had a job that paid me $61,000 per year it would cover all my expenses. With me at home we are actually saving money. To be honest with you, I don’t think I would end up paying $350. I think realistically it would be anywhere between $400 and $500 so the $61,000 is a bear minimum figure.
So now you know a little bit about why I decided to stay home. A lot of it is financial reasoning.
Same deal here led me to my SAHM status. It’s what I always wanted to do anyway, but the financial realities wouldn’t have left many other options! I’m good with that.
Hi Kerri, how are ya?
I think financial issues are primarily the biggest contributing factors for most people. Not all but probably most…
Oh this is so much fun… Thanks Kerri for stopping by…
Ouch. That’s a lot of money. We’ve been lucky to have my wife work part time and my mom cover the rest of the days. Sith so many kids you should start working on convincing them that adults pay 10% of their salary to their parents to help in retirement.
Hi there Mike. Yea that is a ton of money. I would rather stay home and raise my own kids than go to work ajust to pay to ship them off. Doesn’t make sense to me.
I think that is awesome that you get to stay at home and it totally makes sense!
I think a lot of Dad’s would rather work, so you obviously are a great Father and one day your kids will thank you for it!
Jayda
It has its moments. I do hope my kids will realize some day when they are grown up and gone that I stayed home for them. I would do anything for the little kiddos.
I had a hard time not working for the 1st year or so. But now I am used to it.
Oh and welcome to IF Jayda
Those numbers are pure B.S. Did you do ANY price research?! Daycare run about $700 per MONTH for infants and about $500 per month for toddlers. That is $6,000 to $8,400 per year, not $60,000+. Think about, most people don’t make that much, how could they afford daycare. Your nmbers are wrong which suggests that you are opposed to daycare and never bothered to do any research.
I am not opposed to day care Tony. It all depends where you are from how much those prices are. I am afraid that it does cost that much and I know it is hard to believe. When you have one child it would be a lot more manageable. Where we have 5 kids (well soon anyway) those are the numbers we are looking at, unfortunately.
Those numbers are wrong. The national average is $500-$600 per MONTH not per week. You never looked into the price of daycare did you? Call a couple of the places in your area and you will see how wrong you are. I am not saying that you should put your kids in daycare, just that it doesn’t cost as much as you are saying. By the way, Maine is a rural area and daycare costs less in rural areas and more in big cities. So it could very well be less than $500 per month where you live.
OK I will look into it and post them here. My wife and I did the research over 2 years ago and that was the prices we were quoted per week for children. I am not saying you are wrong or right but just that day care is a lot of money… I will go do more research right now and see what I can dig up.
Rem,
Cost me $45 a day for daycare where we live that only covers 1 kid for 4 hrs a day. The daycare center is owned by a relative she charhes $96 daily for her 3 y/o program, 2 aides for 5 kids. She has 12 employees at the rate $10.75 to $12.75 hourly.
PORSHEPHILE
someone should factor in the weekly sick time, doctor visits, medicine and gasoline in all this
It does sound kind of high Rem… but may be different in different areas.
Here in central NC it seems to range between 400 to 1000 a month. The higher end that we looked into is a Montessori type atmosphere… really nice daycare that stresses the importance of older children helping out with the learning of the youger children.
It thing at the VERY BEST we could have found a daycare for 350 a month for our oldest, but for newborns and youger infants it was around 500.
If I had to go back to work right now and we decided to compromise on the type of daycare (not getting the higher end but still looking for quality care) we would probably be paying around 1600 a month just in the daycare.
Your story sounds like ours. My wife was making almost three times my salary. My SAHD status is solely determined by finances. Otherwise my wife would be home… We knew it was important for one of us to be home as long as we could afford it.
Phil, great to see you here. Was wondering when you were gonna pop in.
Yea, as long as we can afford it, it is the right decision.