Speaking Of Money

First Things First – from pg. 417 (used to be 449) “When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation – some fact of my life – unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God’s world by mistake.”

A few years ago, when Dr. Paul was interviewed, I believe I heard that he said the trick is to be in God’s world.

I am of the school that believes that not every action is acceptable, much behavior is unacceptable by its nature and is not of God’s world.

I also believe in the existence of a lower power.

All that being said, if you’re not of the same beliefs, that’s cool. I’m not here to ask you to be. I am leading up to a sequential series of “events” which have contained within them, principles necessary to recovery from alcoholism on an ongoing basis. Those events have revolved around the issue of – the use of, contribution of, spending of, saving of, what society at large likes to call “the root of all evil – money,” in Alcoholics Anonymous.

Some of “my” instincts and also the instincts of others, have confirmed, for me, that I am a master of self-delusion as are my fellow travelers in recovery. We all often make mistakes, misperceive, misunderstand and display our judgmental qualities. I have.

And we haven’t had to drink over any of this!

What a concept…

I’d like to offer my personal thanks to John B. from Oklahoma who offered an extensive, well thought out reply to a previous post on the topic. I’d also like to say thanks to Scott and dAAve who offered their comments and displayed their interest.

Then I’d like to challenge each and every one of you to consider that AA is not bullet proof. If it were, there wouldn’t have been a need for Traditions. If Alcoholics Anonymous dies, how many of us will also die. Think that’s too dramatic? Try looking at reality without the rose-colored glasses.

The sequence of events began with our State Delegate issuing “A Challenge To Follow Our Seventh Tradition.” I read it in print and, after much deciphering, came to the conclusion that some of the things he said irritated the daylights out of me because I felt like I was being driven on a guilt trip. (Please notice all the “I’s”). After much additional thought following the first reaction I found that what was really bothering me could be boiled down more simply. He just hadn’t made himself clear enough, hadn’t offered definitive examples of how we all weren’t self-supporting. I didn’t disagree with the principle, I felt misled by the lack of information which led me to feel manipulated for a reason I couldn’t understand. I don’t like feeling manipulated anymore. So, I emailed him and said his argument didn’t hold water because he hadn’t offered us concrete examples of where AA was falling down in its financial responsibilities. Prior to emailing him, I made use of some oldtimers’ experience I was taught. I read and re-read that email many times then ran it past at least two people I trust before I sent it. I was told about writing letters in haste and sending them without the proper thought process and how that got me in trouble so many times. I try not to do that today.

He responded. Very helpfully. We then exchanged quite a few additional emails, having a discussion that eventually led to the writing of what I proposed as an article for the Grapevine.

The funny thing is – along the way through this discussion, we’ve had additional misunderstandings and misperceptions. For ex. he thought I didn’t think that AA needed any additional monies. Not true.

The end result is that we are actually both on the same page. He and I were taught by different oldtimers, go about recovery in some different ways, but when you boil it all down to the basics, have the exact same goal. Recovery. We want AA to be there for the newcomers exactly the way it was there for us when we were newcomers.

To that end, we both believe in the Traditions and principles. In this case – self-supporting through our own contributions. He has his idea how to make it work, I have a different idea.

It is my belief that we are falling down when it comes to our Traditions in general. Those of us who’ve been here for a while, the groups that have been here for a while, the oldtimers, are no longer speaking of nor offering the importance of, our Traditions to the membership as a whole. That is my belief. I’d love to see it change.

It was brought to my attention when I was new. We had Traditions meetings. We shared on them as a group. Our sponsors told us that when we were doing 90 in 90 that it was damn well necessary to go to Tradition meetings. I was told that beginners meetings didn’t count towards my 90 in 90. Perhaps many are here to scoff (to quote a phrase) but I’m sober today quite a few years later – they didn’t lie to me. “It works. it really does.”

“Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon A.A. unity.”