Survivor Q&A: Cathy Bueti

Earlier today I posted Cathy Bueti’s survivor story. I also had the privilege of asking her a few questions about survivorship … here’s what she shared with me:

1. What was the worst part of your experience with breast cancer?

One of the worst parts I have to say was losing my hair during chemo. More so than losing my boob. I think because I could hide my boob better under my clothes. Both the breasts and hair are so tied into our femininity and part of our sexuality. To loose both at the same time was really hard especially being a single woman out there looking for love and dating.

Post treatment, I also had a hard time with figuring out how to get back to my life. When treatment was finally over I thought I would feel relieved which I did but that was when the fear crept in about recurrence. I wasn’t sure how to live my life with all the new fear. How to live as a survivor. That adjustment was hard.

2. What was the greatest lesson having breast cancer taught you?

That what matters the most is inside us. It’s not about the hair, the boobs, our weight, it is really about who we are as people. It is about how we treat ourselves and how we live our lives. It really taught me what was most important and that is living! And doing what makes us happy, no matter how selfish that may seem. I am still learning that lesson even to this day.

3. Looking back over your experience … is there anything you’re particularly proud you did “right”?

What I am proud I did right was following my instincts. I think as women especially we get those little “voices” that speak to us. We don’t always listen though. This time I listened when it was telling me to go with a mastecomy instead. I found out later when my biopsy results came back that I made the right decision because there was some tissue on the opposite side of where my tumor was that had pre-cancer cells which did not show up on any of my tests prior to surgery. It would have been a recurrence down the road had I just went with a lumpectomy.

4. What advice would you give to someone recently diagnosed, heading into treatment or moving on after?

I would say to someone recently diagnosed that you should always listen to your instincts, be proactive, be a good advocate for yourself, ask lots of questions and keep asking until you are comfortable with the answers. Doctors may not always like it but you need to put yourself first as a patient. Also, it is important to find a medical team you are comfortable with and confident in. Always get second opinions. Take it one day at a time, one moment at a time if you have to. No matter what we face, no matter how much we doubt we can get through it, know that somehow we will. And we do.

5. How did you adjust to the ‘after-cancer life’? How is it now?

It is almost 7 years now for me! I am doing good now. But I am still a work in progress! I still have days where fear gets to me but I am thankful for what cancer taught me and that is to move through the fear, live each moment.

It really helped me to find what it was I loved to do. Being creative, focusing on photography, on beading, and of course my writing really helps. Being creative takes away the fear. It helps me to focus on the postive things.

It can be difficult adjusting to “life after cancer”. I didn’t expect that. Nobody prepared me for it.

I also focused on my health and how to keep myself healthier. I changed my diet significantly and have explored more alternative ways to stay healthy. That also has helped me deal with the fear. Fear can steal so much from us. All the things I have survived in my short life has made me stronger. It has all served a purpose and taught me more about myself. It has taught me how to live ….