The Imperfect Need Not Apply
Among some of the negative feedback that I’ve received from last night’s episode of Supernanny, one of the most interesting was a comment that I was unfit to be giving out parenting advice. Apparently, if a person has to seek out help to ameliorate one’s parenting, it negates any knowledge that they may already have and then obtained from that source of help. I have a hard time understanding this theory.
If a doctor has to get some extra schooling to further his career or help hone his skills, should he be discredited for the knowledge that he does have? Does it mean that he is not capable of helping patients? I do not think that I am a clueless parent. Yes, we had issues that needed Jo’s guidance. I do not see how that makes me any less qualified to give my opinions on parenting. A lot of my posts include research and informative links. My writing helps to educate myself as well as the reader.
Yes, I am imperfect. My parenting is flawed at times. My imperfections are what drive me to educate myself, seek out solutions and then pass that information on to others. I’m sure that Dr. Spock had a few things that were less than perfect, yet he was revered as a great expert on the subject of child rearing. I’m no Spock, but I’m no Homer Simpson either! I have, however, had the occasional “Doooooough!” moment. But it doesn’t make me totally inept or unable to provide guidance based on the lessons that I’ve learned.
Keep tellin’ yourself that realmom. Can you please be done here? We’ve well established that we all love Kadi and you’re not going to change our minds any time soon. So take the ramblings someplace else. Seriously.
Since Realmom seems so stuck on my wearing the cheer uniform being symbolic of a wanna be barbie type, let me just pop that bubble. Those uniforms were in a box in my garage. They asked me to take them out for a fun activity. Then Jo asked me to try them on because she thought it was amazing that I could still fit into them. THEY are the ones who made an issue of the cheer thing. I had not even seen those outfits since I packed them away ten years ago.
I’m glad that there are a million Kadis out in the world. That means that there a million moms who have good hearts, a sense of self worth, a vision, a true love for their children, and a desire to do good in this world. It is all the “realmom” type out there that are truly disturbing.
Okay. i’m done. I’m going to play Play Dough with the kids now that they are up from naps. Maybe you should go do something more beneficial to your own children, Realmom and Solo, instead of sowing such hatred.
Matter of fact, as long as the pictures wasn’t vulgar I wouldn’t care at all! I have a picture of my mom in her early twenties in a strapless one piece that I LOVE! Her hair is long and flowy and she looks vibrant and happy and sexy! I treasure it.
If Kadi is the shallow, brainless bimbo you say she is – why did she have kids (the most self-less, time consuming, image straining activity you can possibly engage in)? Not just ‘kids’, seven of them!
I was never a cheerleader – but surely you can admit that comment about them all being stupid was ridiculous!
I would agree that our culture is obcessed w/ image and beauty and plastic surgery…But I didn’t get that impression from Kadi. Yes, she was thin and pretty, but I didn’t see her extremely fixed up or inappropriately dressed on any part of the episode. Don’t we all wear jeans and t-shirts? Don’t hate on her because maybe she looks better in hers than you do in yours.
Also, I thought solo was a man this whole time.
HA!
Gayla,
Last post, honest. I am glad you can keep telling yourself that Kadi. I am glad you have all these anon people out there rooting for you. I am happy that you feel like you have it going on. I am just a reminder that you are transparent to some. You need to read some Socrates. You need to think about ethics. I never sow hatred. In fact, most people would be shocked at the things I have said in these posts to you. In a way, I even am. But, your dishonesty is that compelling. Your narcissism that disturbing. And your children’s future that important.
wow! I’m going to have to SLOW DOWN typing – typo after typo up there!
I am a hater because my answer to Kadi’s question is an emphatic, no, you should not be giving parenting advice. Whatever.
Sorry if I posted twice.
Now that I got that off my chest…
The main reason for writing this reply is to share my personal connection to Kadi and point out how judgmental children are.
I went to High School with Kadi, I am sure she has no idea who I am.
She was a few years older than me, she was a cheerleader and I played sports (lol and no I am not a lesbian, sorry that is always the response).
Of course my view of cheerleaders was always “Stuck up” but as I befriended several of them in my grade I began to realize they are no different than me. Probably a little more confident since they have to perform with little skirts in front of the whole school and community.
I saw Kadi as a friendly outgoing person, she always said hi when you passed her in the halls and she was always smiling.
For someone to hold a “Front” on the outside while suffering so much pain inside is admirable. I too have suffered deep pain in my life and actually to this day not too many people know. I know how hard it is to function when everything seems to be going wrong. It just goes to show how much we judge people before we even get to know them.
Ok, let me first start by saying all the people that are on here just to shoot off negative comments NEED TO GET A LIFE!
Say what you feel and move on! For the rest of you fueling the flame, IGNORE THEM! I have always been taught that idots like that are looking for a reaction and if you don’t give them one they have nothing to do but talk to themselves.
I laugh at them as they try to make their own fun at others. These are the people that are starving for attention, they are jealous of others or they wouldn’t care.
Jealousy can be defined as followed 1 : a jealous disposition, attitude, or feeling (Jealous : hostile toward a rival or one believed to enjoy an advantage)
Most of the time we create negative action towards people we don’t know because we see a threat, or we see that someone else is enjoying something we want or can’t have.
I stumbled across Kadi’s blog from a mutual acquaintance from high school and I find myself reading it everyday. It is HER life that she is sharing with us, I don’t know how anyone has the authority to tell her what she is doing is wrong or right, IT IS HER LIFE!
If you don’t agree with it, why are you here? Why do you visit? Why do you read? Why do you judge?
She is doing something you are not. She is sharing her personal stories, thoughts and life. When did that become Taboo? I suppose a posing in your bathing suit is far more disrespectful than flashing your cooter to the media right? I mean what Mother should be showing off her body? Mothers are old, fat and ugly right? NO!!! After 7 kids she can go shopping in that bathing suit for all I care, it is more motivation for me to get off my lazy a$$ and work out and I don’t even have kids! We should be praising her for having the confidence to show her body and not being ashamed. Since when are moms scolded for looking great and managing a home full of kids!
Some people have criticized her for her home, WTF? it is also wrong for a family of 9 to have a nice home? Hesperia is in the desert with lower housing costs! This is not a million dollar home people! (lol unless they over paid?) She is away from her friends, I have lived there and I wouldn’t be knocking on the neighbors doors to make friends either! I don’t blame her and besides when does she have time? She is also being criticized for blogging??? What is wrong with people!!!!! Ever heard of a Journal? That is her Journal. So she shares it with us, WE READ IT RIGHT??? The kids are napping, what is she supposed to be watching them like some psycho as they sleep? Let up on her! She is a normal person just like you and me just with an additional head count. Team Kadi!
Sorry everyone. my posts seemed to have gotten all rearranged!
Your brain too.
OK, I’m seriously getting sick of the ” You made the choice to have 7 kids in 8 years so deal with it…” blablala.
I have not yet read all 2 years of her blog, but from what I have had the chance to read she didnt CHOOSE to have a kid per year as much as she was well, Blessed? Gifted? Stuck with? whatever your choice is. The problem isnt that Kadi is stupid, or a whore, or some sort of a freak. Shes a healthy young woman whos body is aparently working quite well by nature’s standards, even if it seems extreme to our 2.3 children per household minds. Over the years Kadi has made mention of birth control and that it didnt work for her. Kadi was even seriously internally injured by an IUD for Christ sake ( no pun intended). SO quit yapping that she did NOTHING to prevent the pregnancies, whatever she did she did with love in her heart and sometimes well, it isnt enough, some higher power had a child that needed a mother, no fault of hers.
Until you personally know someone who has been blessed with above average fertility its easy to throw stones and say ” You CHOSE a big family…” when sometimes it really isnt so. My sister in law had 4 kids in 4 years, and this was with breastfeeding, condoms, and the pill after each one. She has a college education, so its not that she didnt understand the directions. All she could do was smile and accept each child as the gift they are, even tho she wants to scream some days. Her husband finally got a vasectomy, even tho shes in her 20s, which haunts her alot, but she wasn’t going to choose a sexless marriage in order to preserve her physical and mental health. Some religions may disagree with this, but its her choice.
*hugs to Kadi*
I did not see the show, so I cannot comment on what was there. But I do have to say, one cannot put oneself out there on TV, the internet, and everywhere without expecting some negative feedback. Which is why I personally would not do what you did.
I personally don’t have a problem with getting negative feedback from my online and public existence. What I DO have a problem with is people who spew hatred for entertainment purposes.
It’s one thing to have a friendly and thought provoking debate and exchange of differences, but to just be all out mean – These people should be thankful they don’t live anywhere near me. I have a tendency to full out humiliate them in public by *loudly* and with large audiences – pointing out what horrible, vile humans they are to do such things.
Frankly – I think people should make a point to call out mean spirits frequently
Here is the bad thing, Gayla. They will forever hide behind the internet. They will not disclose their blog page, or disclose real information about themselves. They aren’t brave enough. And, the more we leave posts about them, the more snotty comments they will leave….
Not everyone has a blog or a web page you know…
And it isn’t exactly good practice to put full identifying info on the internet anywhere…
Not that this means you should spend your time going around being rude, but some ‘hiding behind the internet’ is a combination of common sense privacy measures and a lack of internet know how.
I knew a nurse once that had problem with protection like that. She had one ‘accident’ after another and she and her husband were trying everything from pills to shots to condoms – one of them was very fertile and it just happened that way. And for goodness sakes – she was nurse – I’m sure she wasn’t just ignorant to the process. Some people are just very fertile. I think they’re a big, sweet family.
Whatever. Nobody has an accidetn per year for 6 years straight. She has seven kids under eight because she is an ignoramous.
What are you saying you would do if you lived near me Gayla. Picket my house with a sign that says mean guy inside? Your a joke.
Accident? I’ll agree with that, mine weren’t accidents, they just happened. BTW- I have three kids that happened with and I WAS on birth control of one form or another, so it does happen.
I wish I could have 7 kids. That is a blessing, Kadi. Dont let anyone tell you otherwise. Although I dont envy you when they get bigger and need designer clothes and laptops for school. Or college, yikes. I only have 2, but I sometimes borrow my friends kids, and sometimes my neice and nephew, just to shake things up.
As a mom, I think that having children at all makes you competent to give advice. There are people out there that pile degrees on top of degrees, but BEING THERE, and actually parenting, is far more informative then sitting in school for a dozen years. Any mom can tell you that. Different things work for different children, so not all advice will work for all children, but I know first hand, almost anything is worth a try.
Its all a learning experience. And a team of moms all brainstorming on a blog is better than 1 mom trying to hack it on her own.
Just MHO.
Very true