The Ralph Kramden Phenomena

Recently Nicole Beland, Women’s Health magazines’s features director appeared with Matt Titus, author of Why Hasn’t He Called, on the CBS The Early Show, to discuss the phenomena of men dating above their station – their looks station. You can see the clip for yourself at /www.womenshealthmag.com/

Ralph Kramden, portly bus driving husband of Alice, played by Jackie Gleason on the Honeymooners, was cited as a perfect example. I’m fairly certain Videos Online</that the combo – beautiful bombshell paired with chubby everyman – is meant as a visual punch line, but these couples exist in real life, as well. 

Man is thought to be genetically predisposed to pick the beautiful woman.  His instincts are telling him that this is the woman who will give him the strong healthy babies. It’s a survival of the fittest, circle of life, plant my seed sort of mentality. 

I agree with Beland when she says in the clip that we are smarter than our instincts.  I love to look at a lovely man, but the man that I love, he may not be every women’s cup of tea.  I love his insides in a way that makes his outsides appear absolutely beautiful to me. He feels handsome, so I respond to his confidence. 

Could it be the same with men?  When they say, “She’s a handsome woman,” are they implying that she is attractive without appearing traditionally pretty?  Are they responding to her confidence?  Not every man is walking down the street with a woman who is his physical appearance superior.  They’ve got to be attracted to something else; it can’t all be about looks. 

What do you think?  How much do looks matter to you?  How much do they matter to your significant other?  Does the whole idea of choosing a mate, based on looks, bother you?