Third Marriage — A Charm?
I received a wedding invitation recently, from someone who has not been a presence in my life for almost 20 years — my father.
He seems to be a person who really needs to be married.
He met and married my mother; they were married for 18 years, then got divorced.
Soon after, he met and married another woman shortly after my mother died; that marriage lasted for about 18 years — until he lost that woman to cancer as well.
Now, he’s on his third marriage…or should I say wedding ceremony?
I’ve always imagined that if something should happen to my husband or we decided to call it quits — that would be it for me…one and done as I like to say.
Well, I probably won’t attend this wedding, but if I did, I might think to raise a glass and say “as you begin again…I hope you will find the peace you’ve been searching for.”
You say that your father’s second marriage ended with the death of his wife. Who’s to say their marriage wouldn’t have continued into their 70’s if the stars were aligned differently?
I’m in the verge of my third marriage. It’s frightening. But I, as I imagine your father to be, am a vital and loving person. I married my first husband to produce children. I was so baby crazed I didn’t realize he would be the only child in our marriage. I married my second husband for security — not realizing his insecurities would nearly cost me my life. The third relationship is what marriage should be — love, respect and mutual admiration.
I swore I would never marry again. But sometimes, when we’ve learned our lessons, God sends us what we need. I thank God I haven’t forgotten how to love; and neither has your father.
Linda,
I’m the new BlogFabulous blogger Tracee Sioux. I am answering your post because I hadn’t actually read the original post.
I’m so glad that you are a vital and loving person. It also sounds like Kim’s father had very long-term marriages by today’s standards.
I think everyone “imagines” they would be married once and that would be it. They’d never make the “mistake” again. But, once you live real life perhaps the “done” part is harder than it looks. I guess I’d already be on “two and done.”
Glad you’ve found your happiness.
Tracee
Your father likes being married. I think that’s fine. His first marriage ended, unfortunately, but he went on to meet someone else and try again. He was with two women, it seems, during a 36-year span (2 18-yr marriages). In today’s society, that’s pretty amazing.
And so, rather than face life alone, he wishes to marry again? More power to him. He believes in love and I find that touching.
I’m sorry he hasn’t been much of a presence in your life. Perhaps you can play the adult this time and approach him, wish him well and extend an invitation to play a bigger part in your life with his newfound love.