Thoughts on the sandwich squeeze
The National Post has a good article about the financial squeeze faced by the sandwich generation.
Baby Boomers are often faced with the financial load of elderly parents as well as, sometime adult, children. For some, this means working beyond the age when they originally planned to retire. There is also the social strain felt when formerly empty-nesters find themselves with children and elderly parents living in their home.
When I read things like this, I often think how fortunate I am that my parents have done two things for me.
First, they have planned well. My parents are/were by no means wealthy, but, good financial planning has been everything since my mother became ill. They have always been properly insured and contributed to pensions and retirement accounts as well as modest investments, etc.
I can’t imagine how it would be for me to be financially responsible for him right now. I lose enough work time as it is, I don’t know how we would do it otherwise, and, I am so very lucky.
The second thing that they have done for me (I am an only child) is give me the knowledge that whatever I need to do concerning their care is OK with them. Whatever one decides about elder care may be stressful, it’s just nice that if I have to make a tough decision, I know that it will be OK because they have tried to keep me from feeling guilty.
They have both told me that it’s fine to use a long term care facility for them if that is what becomes the best thing to do. We were fortunate that my mother did not become confused, but, if she had, and, even if she said otherwise while she was confused, I was comfortable that she had no problem moving to a nursing home if needed. She was very adament that her care not become an undue burden to my father and me and that I needed to care for my children first. Therefore, she wanted to and did move to a long term care facility not long before she died.
Like you, I have parents that have kept their affairs fairly well in order, and have limited my exposure to loss of time and time off from work, but not strapped with the burden of the financial responsibilities.
But I remember when I was young, after my grandmother had a stroke, my mother having to do that juggling act. She took care of all of us, but not without some medication and still losing a little bit of her sanity along the way. I saw what a strain it was on her… and it frightens the hell out of me.