Three Rarely Discussed Aspects of Eating Disorders
September 20, 2008 by angelique
Filed under Women's Health
The side effects of having an eating disorder most often described by bloggers and the media are the obvious ones — heart problems, teeth concerns, osteoporosis. But there are some aspects of eating disorders that I’ve rarely seen described.
Here are three that I just don’t think most people know about:
1. Financial Woes. Bulimics will spend quite a bit of money on their binges. They’ll max out their credit cards to feed their addiction, if need be.
2. Career Instability. Many anorexics and bulimics eventually enter a sort of “career burnout” mode. Though most are labeled “model employees” or perfectionists, they eventually come to a point where they have to decide between the eating disorder and their job. For many, the ED wins.
3. Loss of Support Network. We always suggest using a support network if you’re trying to recover from an eating disorder, but the truth could easily be that bridges have been burnt, perhaps beyond repair. Lying and (in some cases) theft do happen and they can destroy otherwise strong relationships.
What have I missed?
I could be way off base here, but I am going to give it a shot (here all the time reading posts, 1st time commenting)…
I am 25 years old and have had an eating disorder (Bulimia/Purging Disorder???) for 10 years now. I am 5′ 6, 120 pounds…not fat. Although, I think I am everyday. I am tired of it. I am tired of hating the skin I am in. I want to live my life. I’ve tried everything…support groups, therapy, doctor after doctor, treatments, anti-depressants, and the list goes on….I read about people who are 50 and still fight the battle everyday.
My doctor recently gave me a script for Phentermine because I feel like I am losing my mind and it is the only thing that makes me feel like a normal person. When I take it, I actually don’t pray for each day to be over. I don’t think about food all day. I don’t worry about what I ate or will eat. I don’t purge. I don’t excessively exercise. It has a ripple effect…it changes everything. (***He weighed me when he wrote the script…if I return in 2 weeks weighing less, deals off so I still have to eat)
We are currently discussing putting me on Adderall…an amphetamine that suppresses one’s appetite (to a lesser extent than the Phentermine).
My point…a rarely discussed item would be using appetite suppressants to alleviate the misery caused by these terrible diseases. When it is discussed, like on this site, it is negative and I don’t understand why.
Now please don’t anyone snap back at me…I understand the consequences of using amphetamines; however, we also pay a high price starving ourselves, excessively exercising, and vomiting up our meals. Not to mention, the relationships that we damage and the emotional pain that we put ourselves through.
And if I had to say which ones are the worst to manage I’d say it’s the financial woes, loss of support network and career instability.
I can’t think of anything else besides the obvious self loathing, hopeless and helpless mentality. Ah, the depression.
The physical consequences are scary enough to get one into treatment I think. At least that’s how it was for me. But losing a job when one is depressed is pretty much losing a major aspect of live. The only thing that remains is the ed. And dear God, when the entire world turns their back on you because you’ve forced them to lose hope on you — well, all of these things just seem to happen one right after the other after the other and you find yourself even more hopeless and helpless and unstable and in more debt and engaging in more behaviors.
A nasty cycle.
I’m starting something different though. Fixing ONE thing at a time. Because trying to cure it all is a recipe for failure and could quite possibly make me feel even worse about myself.
RL,
Thanks for being brave enough to go ahead and put it out there.
First, I don’t even know what the consequences of using amphetamines would be. And I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to talk to my doctor about it although I am afraid of being reprimanded for suggesting such a thing. I suppose, in a sense, it’s just like “giving in” to what both we (and the eating disorder want).
My therapist just suggested I see a psychiatrist at the same clinic and since we don’t have a relationship yet — I’m definitely going to bring this up! I know everything can’t be solved with a pill. I know I’ll still have to eat — but if there’s something that would lessen the anxiety and certainly as you wrote the MISERY that we live with day in and day out, then maybe that would help.
I think your doctor has the right idea about it, too. Providing guidelines about how your weight cannot drop or he won’t continue to support this effort. And just based on what you’ve written — it does seem like you’ve tried everything. If anti-depressants are prescribed to make one feel better about one’s situation without any physical changes in place, then I don’t see the problem with amphetamines.
I guess it’s not ideal. I suppose the goal would be to get us to a point in life where food doesn’t control our thoughts and drive us absolutely insane! But I don’t see any harm in medication being a nudge of sorts to getting (and keeping) us there.
Erin & RL:
You both raise good points. (And welcome, RL — we won’t snap at you here! It’s a pretty friendly blog site, though somewhat slanted at times, I admit!)
I’d love to be able to say, “How can you even THINK of solving one problem with something that could cause a DIFFERENT problem?” But I know that sometimes the solution isn’t necessarily perfect.
Erin, you brought up a good point — there are many people who feel that taking an anti-depressant to help with eating disorders is a “stop gap” measure and could lead to further difficulties. Yet for those of us who suffer from clinical depression (a trigger of EDs for many), an anti-depressant is a lifesaver, perhaps literally.
It just goes to show what a personal disease an ED is. Even if you’re diagnosed with anorexia or bulimia, your condition can be extremely different from someone else’s. No wonder it’s such a tough battle to win.
Thanks to both of you for writing! I appreciate hearing voices like yours!
i used to spend $60-$100 a day on binge food. no joke. Eventually i resorted to stealing it, which i hate to admit. I was like a drug addict.
As for the drug thing: Im a fully recovered bulimic, so I know what its like, but i also know what it takes to truely get better.
You have to do what works to save your life, but I feel like prescription drugs are a bandaid for the problem. The issue isnt your appetite (even though it is extremely out of whack, your electrolytes are going crazy with purging) its how you feel about yourself. Even though I was severly underweight, I still felt fat, a counselor helped me realize i thought I was “fat” because I didnt feel like i deserved any of the space i took up, no matter how little space that may be. Once I learned WHY i didnt love myself (family issues) I learned that i DID deserve love, and I dont need it from anyone else: I can give it to myself.
After that (which tooks years) food’s hold broke over me- and it had nothing to do with drugs or diet. I did have to learn how to eat properly, and i did mess up A LOT, but learning to love yourself truely is the key to recovery.
Kelly Turner
http://www.groundedfitness.com
RL
Do whatever it takes to rid yourself of your ED. I have been bulimic since 19 (went away to college and found a new trick!) and I am now 32 and I have no idea fix it and I feel lost and pointless. Don’t wnd up where I am for goodness sake.
Jenna
See that’s what I am saying…if you could get a kick start on kicking the habit by taking an amphetamine like Phentermine or Adderall why not?
I refuse to live the rest of my life obsessing about food about food everyday. I can’t do it. I’m ruining relationships. I am teacher and sometimes can barely function at my job.
I urge you to investigate these types of treatment options in combination with therapy and support groups. I am by no means cured, but geez I feel like I’m getting a break here.
If I end up being dependent on these drugs the rest of my life, which is something I have thought long and hard about this past two weeks, I will deal with it. However, 2 1/2 hours at the gym a day, vomiting up the smallest of meals, feeling so terrible that I want to sleep all day…that is not something I can any longer tolerate.
Keep me updated. I’ll keep you in my thoughts I truly believe no one should have to deal with this forever.
I have had a look at those drugs on the net and tbh I don’t think they would have helped me. If anything they may well have made me worse. I really don’t know what you should do. What I would have done is maybe checked into a hospital for a few months to take me ‘out of circulation’ and hopefully break the habit. Then again you need money for this. That’s about all I can offer. I am giving an opinion as loads of people never gave me an opinion and I just wanted them to say something, anything, just a view.
Maybe you are special and unique. It’s no good but I wonder sometimes if the world needs the likes of me (and you) for balance despite how unpleasant the experience of living it may be for us.
Jenna
You said…”Maybe you are special and unique. It’s no good but I wonder sometimes if the world needs the likes of me (and you) for balance despite how unpleasant the experience of living it may be for us.”
Wow…profound statement! Thanks~I needed to hear that.
RL and whoever,
I have been living with Anorexia since I was in high school, so about 12 years now. I also have narcolepsy, With that said, I can understand that where the Adderall could be a plus for you, the fact that I have to take it for my narcolepsy put the control I had on my anorexia into a downward spiral. So you see, where it may be beneficial for you because it provides you with a relief and gives you a feeling of control, it also provides me with a feeling of control as well, just in a very negative way. It enabled me to pick back up where I left off and I had absolutely no sense of hunger. As for the phentermine, if I could get my hands on that, I would in a heartbeat. There’s a major difference between phentermine and adderall. If by now, you have started taking the adderall, then you know exactly what I mean! Good luck to you. I really hope that you are able to maintain control. I know it’s something that all of us with an eating disorder struggle with….control in a positive way!
Dear l68360p,
You’d hate the Phentermine…it sucks in comparison to the Adderall. It loses its effectiveness more quickly and increasing the dose is not possible because it is so bad for your body.
I started the Adderall about 4 weeks ago…I am much better than I was on the Phentermine. The Phen made me jumpy and anxious…the Adderall evens me out.
You are most right though, eating is last on the list. Funny…it goes from controling my life to being something I have to force myself to do. Its like I can’t win. However, this is better.
I guess its a necessary evil????
I won’t go back to where I was….ever. Without some sort of appetite suppressant I would rather be dead (as sad as that sounds) I just don’t ever want to live like that again.
Now I just have to working on learning to love me…I guess learning to like me would be a good start:-)
I hope I learn control too…it seems like finding the right balance is impossible. One day I will and once I do I won’t let go
Glad you wrote.