Understanding The Alcoholic Mind – Really? [Touched By Motives]

See this from yesterday;

“If his arrangements would only stay put, if only people would do as he wished, the show would be great. Everybody, including himself, would be pleased. Life would be wonderful.”

Then, when the show doesn’t please the alcoholic mind “What Usually Happens?”

“He begins to think life doesn’t treat him very well. He decides to exert himself more. He becomes, on the next occasion, still more demanding or gracious, as the case may be.”

And the family will have to use their “computer eyes” to decipher what to expect – demanding or gracious, probably knowing intuitively that in some manner they’re being manipulated. They certainly know that none of this feels right or good.

“Still the play does not suit him. Admitting he may be somewhat at fault, he is sure that other people are more to blame. He becomes angry, indignant, self-pitying. What is his basic trouble?

The Big Book has a perfect answer but I think, because the oldtimers taught me this, that this is where “His Majesty the Baby” appears. Think about it. When an infant throws a tantrum aren’t they angry, indignant and self-pitying? Stomping their feet, screaming louder and louder, etc. That is, until they get their way…

“Is he not really a self-seeker even when trying to be kind? Is he not a victim of the delusion that he can wrest satisfaction and happiness out of this world if he only manages well? Is it not evident to all the rest of the players that these are the things he wants?”

Which, now thankfully, begs the question – so what if he wants it? Who the he** is he?

“And do not his actions make each of them wish to retaliate, snatching all they can get out of the show? Is he not, even in his best moments, a producer of confusion rather than harmony?”

An alkie producing harmony? Wouldn’t that be the day…

“Our actor is self-centered – ego-centric, as people like to call it nowadays. He is like the retired businessman who lolls in the Florida sunshine in the winter complaining of the sad state of the nation; the minister who sighs over the sins of the twentieth century; politicians and reformers who are sure all would be Utopia if the rest of the world would only behave; the outlaw safecracker who thinks society has wronged him; and the alcoholic who has lost all and is locked up. Whatever our protestations, are not most of us concerned with ourselves, our resentments, or our self-pity?”

Anything ringing any bells for ya’?