We Love Someone With Autism
August 24, 2006 by Kristina Chew, PhD
Filed under Health
Whatever you might think about the puzzle ribbon as an autism symbol, I did wish that Jim had been wearing his t-shirt reading I love someone with autism and the puzzle ribbon (like this one) this afternoon on the beach. We are down to the last day of our beach vacation and after spending an hour-plus putting together a 150 piece puzzle of the scrambled states, Charlie cried out and cried loud and long, as we walked down to the beach and as he swam with Jim out into the ocean.
Yes, beachgoers cast us puzzled looks or averted their gaze as if to say: What’s that kid doing hollering on the beach? Why are his parents insisting that he swim? Is he sad—-this is vacation!
After a half-hour of boogie boarding with his dad, Charlie started to smile if he got a ride on a wave; after another half-hour of bodysurfing in some big waves, Charlie was positively “peaceful easy-feeling” and running on the sand.
We love someone with autism, indeed.
(Jim’s “I love someone with autism” t-shirt is washed and ready to go for our last day at the beach.)
Hmmmm…never thought of that t-shirt in that way. Truthfully, it had always annoyed me, as if the parents were vying for sainthood status by parenting an autistic child. But, you are right – when bystanders become curious at best and rude at worst, such a shirt DOES a positive service by clarifying the reality of the situation.
We’re definitely not saints, or trying to be some…….
I wish I had this t-shirt to wear yesterday as I left the line of the ride we were waiting on at Great Adventure with a screaming Roo and a man asked, “is he tired?”. It was not a scream of a tired child, but one who was dealing with sensory overload.
Amusement parks—never an easy place for Charlie, for sure. Once when Jim was in a store with Charlie—who was running up and down excitedly—-a woman said, “is he nuts?”. Jim was wearing an autism shirt and pointed to it in response.
Good for Jim for his self-control. I’d probably have been tempted to say something equally blunt in reply.
The shirt is a nice idea, and probably a lot more constructive.
I think it was one of those shirts (yes, I’ve bought him a few over the years) that lists some of the criteria for autism on the back, though I don’t think Jim went so far as to point to that!
I echo Ian Parker’s comment here “good for Jim for his self control”. Meeting an affront with calm and patience is frequently a much more powerful response than a caustic comeback. It takes strength not to let that first visceral response take flight. Thanks for setting a good example.
no one wants to be seen as a saint for dealing with their child’s autism. i think people just want other people to quit staring and be a little more tolerant. it makes me mad that some people can be loud and rude for no reason, and we are just forced to accept it. however, someone with ligitmate difficulties is gawked at and commented about.
kudos to your family and their strength.
Many thanks, c!
Susan’s comment really upset me. These children didn’t choose to be autistic. I guess if Susan had a child like mine then she would be doing the same thing. Spreading awareness and understanding of the disorder. Some people don’t have enough love in their heart. Susan, if you want to learn love and compassion. Learn what autism is. Look into the faces of love and compassion. From Tiffany and Mathew (age 7) with Autism.